Me: Well, it’s the color of my life.
I glanced around my office, wondering if anyone could see me blush, but the library was empty and the kids hadn’t started to pile in yet.
Kayden: Impossible.
Me: Entirely true.
Kayden: Come on! You’re Mike’s sister, and you’re hot as hell. No way you’re boring.
My belly flipped at “hot as hell.” It made my skin prickly, but in a sexy, spine-tingling way.
Me: I’m nothing like my brother, Kayden. I learned what not to do by watching him.
Kayden—even his name wasn’t bland.
Kayden: I never thought you were. You just share DNA. That doesn’t make you navy blue. Tell me more about yourself. Are you seeing anyone?
How much should I tell him? I’d never meet him. I’d read the stories about women being abducted and never heard from again. I didn’t know the man behind the message. Freddie knew him in school, but so many things changed as we get older. He could be a total creeper with a side of serial killer, and no one would be the wiser.
Me: I’m seeing someone casually. He’s a nice guy.
Kayden: That’s the kiss of death.
Me: What is?
Kayden: Being a nice guy. It’s code for he sucks.
I snickered at the spot-on interpretation of Gary. It’s exactly what I meant without coming right out and saying it.
Me: He doesn’t suck. It’s not easy to find someone to fit my perfect mold.
Kayden: I thought I found “the one” twice in my life. I’ve abandoned trying and stopped dating altogether.
Why were all the hot guys unavailable? It left single ladies like me to drown in a sea of gray and turning to our fictional men for companionship.
Me: I can’t give up, not yet at least.
Kayden: Why did you end up divorced? If I can ask. I don’t want to offend you.
Leaning back in my chair, I tapped my foot against the carpet and thought about how I’d explain everything that happened—or didn’t happened, I should say.
Me: So many things went wrong. I met him right after high school, and we married years later. The relationship lacked in so many ways, but I ignored them, waiting for things to change.
A lump formed in my throat thinking about my past failure. I thought I’d be with him forever and that we’d have a family and grow old together. I couldn’t have been more wrong, but it was me who asked for the divorce. I couldn’t accept the mundane existence that was my marriage.
Kayden: Lacked how?
I sipped on my coffee, waiting for his reply and thought back on how unhappy I was back then. One day it was like a lightbulb switched on, and I realized I couldn’t take another day just existing together. I wanted the love I read about. I wanted the romance. I wanted a partner and not a friend.
Me: I felt more like a roommate and his housekeeper. Totally passionless. There was no romance. We talked about having kids, but it would’ve been a miracle.
Kayden: Was he gay?
I spat out my coffee, drenching my desk as I read his message. The thought had crossed my mind a time or two, especially since he was never particularly interested in sex.
Me: No. We weren’t right for each other, and I had to walk away.
Kayden: All that long brown hair, big beautiful brown eyes, and with that smokin’ hot body. How can a man not want to fuck you?
