How can I do that when I always have one eye out for him?
The question rattles around in my weary head as we enter the house, where I flip on the lights before taking off my jacket.“Those women from the board of that women’s shelter loved you,” I muse while Sophia heads straight for the refrigerator, removing her heels along the way.“Do you think you’ll take them up on the spot opening up next month?”
She groans softly while pouring a glass of ginger ale.“I doubt they meant it.”
“Why would they express an interest in having you take the position if they weren’t serious?”I ask, approaching from the other side of the island between us.“It would be a big step for you.Solidify you as a philanthropist.”
“And it would look good for the family,” she concludes, sounding bored before sipping from her glass.
“What’s wrong with that?”I ask as I remove my cufflinks.Is it because I want her to do it?Is she that resentful?
Instead of answering, she tips her head to the side, watching me remove my tie.“Staying in now?”
“I typically like to sleep at night,” I reply, eyeing her with a smirk.“You sound surprised.”
“I thought you would be in a hurry to give your papa the full report of what happened tonight,” she murmurs, wearing an overly sweet smile.“What, he’s not waiting up for you?”
I shouldn’t let her get to me.She’s obviously in a mood, looking for a fight.There’s no stopping my hackles from rising, though.“And there I was, thinking we had a nice time for the most part,” I retort.“I thought we made a good team out there.Now you have to throw this sarcastic shit at me.”
Shaking her head slowly, she replies, “Wow.It’s almost like I’m an actual person and not someone you can dress up and parade around, then put back in my box when we’re finished.”
“Is that what you think I’m doing?”
“It’s what Iknowyou’re doing,” she snaps, and now any attempt at hiding her anger is history.“You’re all about presenting this image to these people you’re trying to impress.Making sure they spread the word that our families aren’t running around killing each other anymore.”
The dismissive hand she waves makes me grind my teeth.
“I’m glad you think it’s not a big deal.But then why would you?”I ask with a bitter chuckle.“We’re not talking about makeup and pretty dresses now.”
“That’s what you think of me?All I care about is makeup and pretty dresses?”Slamming the glass on the counter, she pins me in place with a withering look.“Tell me, husband, dear.Did it ever occur to you that’s all I have?And don’t tell me I need to spend more time up at the house,” she warns, thrusting a shaking finger my way as she marches around the island.
“Get your finger out of my face,” I warn once she comes to a stop.
“Sure.Because that’s the real problem here.My finger.”Her eyes flash before she touches both hands to my chest and shoves.“There.That better?”
I barely felt it.At least, the force of the shove did nothing to me.The touch of her hands, meanwhile?My skin burns through my shirt.“What are you trying to do?Start a fight?It’s a little late for this,” I grunt while a storm builds inside and a craving along with it.
Yes, yes, give her what she wants.It’s what I want too.An excuse to let go for once.The way I did in the gym.
“What are you so afraid of?”she demands, shaking, red-faced.“Talk to me.I’m right here.I’m a human being!”
“I never said you weren’t.”Fuck, she is so tempting.Sweet, ripe, and alive, bubbling over with emotion, daring me to feel what I haven’t let myself feel in too long.“And now I have to get to bed because I have a long day ahead of me.”
“No, dammit!You are going to talk to me.I am your wife, not some underling you can dismiss whenever you feel like it.Or what?”she adds with a nasty laugh and a toss of her head.“You need a gun in your hand to feel strong and tough?Because otherwise, all you do is run away like a coward.”
That’s what does it.
That’s what takes ten years of sacrifice and self-control and throws it all out the window.
It’s what makes me back her across the room until we reach the front door, which she hits with a gasp before her arms end up pinned over her head, and I even realize I’ve closed my hands around her wrists.
For a few breathless seconds, it’s enough to stare down at her this way, to watch understanding turn her outrage into something closer to fear.Fear, which feeds the fire now blazing out of control and threatening to consume us both.
“I don’t need a gun to be strong.”Leaning down, our breaths mingling between us, I feel her body shudder against me.“Do you want me to prove it?”
“Let me go,” she whispers, teeth clenched.Her chest heaves with every ragged breath she takes, and the fragrance clinging to her skin gets more intense, especially when I cross her wrists and pin them to the door with one hand, leaving the other free to trail down her flushed cheek.
“No, because you reminded me of something.”The hair trailing over her shoulder is soft to the touch, like silk between my fingers.“You are my wife.And until now, I’ve tried to be a gentleman and give you space and time.Obviously, that’snotwhat you want.”
