Quinn felt emotional as she watched Riley come back to her senses. She seemed confused, baffled, overwhelmed even. Tears trickled from the corners of her eyes, and Quinn kissed them away. “Are you okay?” she whispered.
“Yeah.” Riley nodded and pulled her in, her lips lingering against Quinn’s before she let out a soft breath. “But that was…” She paused, stroking Quinn’s face. “That was crazy.”
“Good crazy?” Quinn suggested.
Riley nodded, and Quinn kissed her forehead and the tip of her nose. The thunder rolled, and the rain clattered even harder, the noise nostalgic like a lyrical memory. For now, she was back home, but she wasn’t the young girl anymore who had hidden under the covers, anxious about the storms. Tonight, it felt fitting, and she welcomed each clap of thunder and flash of lightning with open arms. The storm outside was as loud and clear as her feelings for Riley, who curled up against her and nuzzled her neck.
41
RILEY
Lying in Quinn’s arms, Riley listened to the wind. It was picking up again, building after calming down for an hour. If she’d been here alone, she’d be scared, but tonight it felt dramatic, romantic, and even comforting as it filled the silence between them.
The branches of the willows blew against her bedroom window, tapping the glass as if pleading to let them in and shelter them from the storm. Their silhouettes danced underneath the dark sky, slowly at times, then violently as stronger gusts of wind came and went.
Riley felt at ease, lifted, as she snuggled into the crook of Quinn’s arm, and she had a strange sense that maybe she was right where she was supposed to be, where she belonged. Living for her job, she’d never belonged to anyone, not even her ex-husband, who had tried so hard to make it work despite Riley never being around. Even if she had put in the effort, she doubted it would have worked out because he couldn’t have made her feel like this. No man could make her feel like this; she knew that now. She’d never belonged to a place either; she’d only lived in the penthouse she rented for a year, and before that, she’d never stayed anywhere for longer than two years. Perhaps Aster House would grow on her and become a place that felt like home; the house seemed like a better place when Quinn was around.
Her thoughts were interrupted by the howling of the wind, and there was that familiar noise again, the slow creaking every few seconds. “I can hear it now,” she whispered. “The house is breathing.” She listened again, closing her eyes while Quinn stroked her face. “It sounds tired.”
“It’s old. But that’s the charm of it, right?”
“Hmm…” Riley smiled, turned on her side to face Quinn, and scooted closer. She needed to be near her, to feel her heat, her softness that she would always crave from this night on. Now that she’d discovered the sensation of a woman—of Quinn—she couldn’t go back, and she didn’t want to. “What’s it like for you to be here again, at night?”
“It’s strange. Times have changed.I’vechanged. It’s not my world anymore, but I love being here with you. It makes sense because of you.” Quinn leaned in to place a trail of kisses down Riley’s forehead to the tip of her nose and brushed a lock of hair behind her ear. “What’s this like for you? Do you want me to leave? I won’t be offended, I promise.”
“No, I don’t want you to leave. I haven’t felt like this in…well, ever.” Riley smiled shyly. “I’d love to wake up with you.”
“No regrets?”
“None other than not trying this sooner. You’re pretty amazing, Quinn.”
“And you’re….” Quinn rolled on top of her, and Riley sighed. The rush of Quinn’s warmth against her skin and the feel of her weight ignited the fire in Riley again. “You’re special,” Quinn said. “I don’t meet women like you here very often.” She shook her head. “No, strike that. I’ve never met someone like you.”
“I don’t mean to sound negative, but I’m just a middle-aged woman with too much time on her hands and no idea who she is. I don’t see how that can be special.”
“That time can be put to good use now,” Quinn joked, teasing Riley’s nipple with the tip of her finger. Her mischievous expression dropped, and she kissed her softly. “You’ll find your way, I promise.”
“I know. This is a good start, for sure.” Riley shivered at Quinn’s touch and ran her hands down to Quinn’s behind. The smoothness of her skin and the curved landscape of her body mesmerized her; she’d been apprehensive at first, but now she wanted to feel all of her. “I want to touch you,” she whispered and pushed Quinn to the side before she steadied herself over her and kissed her neck. From her quiet moans, Riley could tell she liked it, but she still seemed apprehensive as Riley moved down to her breasts to fold her lips around a nipple. It hardened immediately, and Quinn’s chest lifted, but she cupped Riley’s face and pulled her back up. “Not yet,” she said, then bit her lip regretfully.
“Why?”
“Because I’m not ready.”
That statement seemed absurd to Riley after what Quinn had just done to her, but she nodded and ran her hands through Quinn’s hair. “Okay.”
“It’s not you. I’m just not used to this kind of intimacy.”
Riley nodded. “Do you mind if I ask why not?”
“It’s just the way it’s always been.” Quinn shrugged. “I got used to playing a certain role in my life. I was always the pleaser, even with my first girlfriends in college. Most of them were only exploring their sexuality at the time. They all went back to men in the end, and I was reluctant to give myself to them, as it was never going to last.
“And you think I’m only gay for a day?” Riley joked.
“Possibly not.” Quinn gave her a lopsided smile. “But I tend to go for straight women. It’s a weakness. I just can’t help myself. You’re not just some straight-woman conquest if that’s what you think,” she quickly corrected herself. “You’re very, very special to me. But until I’m sure we’re on the same page, I’d rather spend my nights focusing on you, if that’s okay.”
Riley chuckled and laced her fingers through Quinn’s. “Hey, I won’t complain after what you just did to me, but I never thought you’d be the one to shy away.” She regarded Quinn and noted how vulnerable she looked, so she dropped her smile and continued. “Take all the time you need. I’ve learned time is a gift, not a burden. That’s what moving to the middle of nowhere and meeting a very special woman taught me.”
42
