And another dreamy kiss, which made frosty Olivia Sachdeva, detached and perfectionist lawyer to A-listers, high.
“Marry me,” whispered in her head again.
It would be so natural to ask, with Kate close and reassuring, melting away all her worries. But as soon as Olivia walked upstairs with Zoe, leaving Kate to finish her work, a shiver of worry penetrated inside and anxiety recrystallised.
Kate had been married twice, to people she never wanted to see again. Olivia could forgive her not being enthusiastic about the institution. Olivia saw the bitterness of divorce everyworkday. Marriage was almost synonymous with breaking up in both their lives.
What if she asked her? Kate, who said she adored and felt stronger with her than any other. What if Olivia asked? And Kate said no.
She put a hand to her heart. It didn't matter how rational and understanding she might be. It made perfect sense for Kate to say no, after all.
But it would still hurt.
Chapter 3
Something bothered Olivia. Kate had wondered earlier, then dismissed it as the childcare arrangements with Geeta. But as they got ready for the evening, a tightness lingered.
Olivia was considered, and her few words reflected a deep well of thought – exactly what Kate loved about her. After too many rash people in her life, Olivia was her steady centre now. Her heart flipped over in appreciation as she watched Olivia sort the change bag at the long kitchen table, ready for Geeta to take Zoe for the evening.
There was definitely something up, a reticence beyond Olivia's usual pause for consideration. A shift in tension, without an obvious source. Maybe as an actress and an acute studier of people, maybe because they were so strongly attuned to each other, but Kate seemed to read Olivia better than most.
Zoe tugged at toys on a mat on the floor, happy. Kate's seven-year-old, Bea, and fourteen-year-old, Ralph, had already left with their father, Harry, for the weekend and the house was calm. Olivia’s work was going smoothly. So what might it be?
Olivia paused, dissatisfied. She swooped her shining black hair behind her ear and plucked out the contents of the change bag one by one. Nappies, wipes, bottles, cream, mat, change of clothes. Then, one by one, repacked them neatly in the compartments. She zipped up the black bag and rested her light-brown fingers, rigid, on the top.
Kate knew what would happen next. Those contents were coming right back out again.
“Hey,” she whispered.
She stepped closer and swept her arm around Olivia’s waist.
“Would you like me to double-check the bag?”
She could almost see Olivia's thoughts whizzing around in distress. Olivia relaxed in her embrace and softened into Kate.
“Thank you,” Olivia murmured, and a serenity overcame Olivia’s beautiful features.
“Go get changed,” Kate gently suggested – from the comfortable, elegant black dress Olivia had worn in the day, into another dark dress for the evening. Always stylish, always sexy to Kate.
Olivia nodded, a subtle smile lifting her cheeks, and Kate reading the appreciation, relief and love there.
But a pause. Again. What was it?
Kate opened her mouth to ask, but, “My mother will be here in a minute,” Olivia said.
“OK.” Kate nodded, and the moment and Olivia slipped from her arms.
She watched her walk towards the stairs, the saunter as smooth as ever. One more look over her shoulder, then Olivia disappeared, apparently not ready to say what was on her mind.
That was OK. Kate would wait longer, before trying to coax what preyed on her.
Like when they decided Olivia should move in, a gentle suggestion from Kate after Olivia stayed more often.
And the quiet realisation that Olivia was thoughtful after best-friend Charlotte announced she and partner Millie were going to have a baby. Kate had held her, before asking, “Did you ever think about having kids?”
A rigidity had crept over Olivia, and Kate waited, until Olivia breathed out, and the tension collapsed, and she said, “I’ve started to panic about it,” all in one breath.
An admission followed in a torrent, about how she’d changed her mind about kids and wanted a baby. Just the one.
