"So, you faked your own death?" I guess.
Ian nods. "I knew my family would end up killing me by accident sooner or later because of my curse. I decided to just get it over with and get out of there. I secretly paid a caster to enchant a stake so it would put a strong petrification spell on me as soon as I was stabbed with it, so my heart would stop before it officially stabbed me, and it would look like I was dead. All I had to do was leave it lying around, and my curse took care of the rest. After everything went down, Everett dug up my grave. He used an elixir made by the same caster to lift the petrification spell."
So Everett did know.
I probably shouldn't hold the whole not-telling-me-Ian-is-alive thing against my brother, but it still stings.
After Ian's words sink in, I look at him, trying and failing at keeping the emotion out of my voice. "I'm really,reallyglad you're not dead."
He grimaces. "About that…" He turns to face me, his blue eyes searching mine. "Before I tell you this next thing, promise that you won't be scared of me."
"Me, scared ofyou?"I can't help grinning. "Ian. You used to refuse to go out in the rain because you believed it came from the gods flushing their toilets up in Paradise."
A surprised laugh escapes him at that old memory. "In my defense, I was seven, and no one ever says anything about the gods' plumbing situation. It made perfect sense at the time."
"If you say so. I'm just saying, there's no way I can be scared of someone who was once deathly afraid of going out into the 'gods' pee-pee water.'"
He shakes his head at me, his smile slowly dulling until it falls away completely as he takes a deep breath.
"I'm not a vampire anymore, Heidi. I'm a thrall."
I sit up to take on this more serious tone. "Pardon the limited knowledge of a wannabe human like me, but what exactly does that mean?"
"It means that technically, Iamdead."
All remaining humor evaporates as I blink at him, unable to process that.
Ian goes on like he dislikes telling me this, but thinks I should know. "A vampyr who escaped the Nether found me just as the Upheaval was starting. Thanks to my curse, he wound up snapping my neck…and then he turned me with his blood, the way a vampyr would turn a human. I survived and woke up as a thrall—not that it felt like waking up from death at all. Thralls don't have control of their own minds or actions. They're just empty, soulless puppets for their vampyr master."
"You're not a soulless puppet," I whisper vehemently.
He shakes his head. "Not anymore. Asher killed the vampyr who turned me just over twenty-four hours ago, but newly freed thralls are unstable in every way. To put it really fucking mildly,"he adds miserably. "What I'm trying to say is, if me being what I am now bothers you?—"
My frustrated huff cuts him off. "What bothers me is that you've suffered so much and you're clearly still struggling, andall I wantright now is to hug you and make you feel better. But I can't even do that for you."
Ian's gaze pins me. "Yes, you can. Hug me. Please."
I shake my head. "You know what will happen. If I touch you, you'll be forced to feel everything I'm feeling. Then things will get really awkward really fast between us, and I just can't?—"
Ian moves blindingly fast until suddenly, I'm wrapped up in his arms with his face pressed into my neck, his breathing turning shaky. Giving in, I embrace Ian back, my heart pounding.
But his breath against my neck and all this much-needed skin contact and his absolutelyridiculousattractiveness is a cocktail that goes right to my hormones. I swallow hard, a flush creeping into my face as sudden, hungry arousal blossoms fast inside me.
I want more touch.
I want to feel him all over me.
Inme.
How am I supposed to help it when the guy I used to be in love with is all grown up with his lips pressed up against my neck, and he smells this freaking amazing?
As soon as he feels my attraction and affection for him, Ian's arms tense around me.
"Oh, gods," he gasps raggedly. "Your feelings…holy fuckinggods, Sunshine."
The heat is scalding my neck and cheeks now as I do my absolute best not to squeeze my thighs together—or try to press my body fully against his. I clamp my eyes shut.
"Sorry, it's just… I'm a mess right now, and I've missed you for too long, and you're just so—it doesn't matter. IswearI won'tmake you uncomfortable like this again. You can totally ignore this, because I really need you to be my friend again?—"
