I nod again. “You can’t tell your quintet this next part.”
Kenzie pantomimes…I’m not sure. Putting on lipstick, maybe? When she sees my confusion, she repeats the gesture.
“Locking up my lips and tossing the key,” she explains, as patient as ever with the glaring gaps in my knowledge of the mortal world.
I take a deep breath to brace myself. “I learned that my father was a man named Pietro Amato.”
Her mouth drops open. “Whoa. Hang on, you’rethePietro Amato’s daughter? My parents told me about him! They knew him way back in the day. So many Reformists still totally love that guy, and he’s only gotten more revered since the Reformist movement is so huge now, and—hang on, if he was your dad, who was your mom?”
“Syntyche.”
For a moment, I think I broke her. Then Kenzie coughs. “Come again?”
“Syntyche. You know, the goddess of reaping, memories, fear, dreams, death, darkness, souls...”
I could go on, since each of the six gods holds dominion over so many things, but Kenzie is extremely pale as she holds up a hand. She’s uncharacteristically silent for so long as she stares blankly at me that I get concerned.
“Kenzie?”
She breathes out finally. “Oh my holy fucking gods. Shit—sorry, I probably shouldn’t say stuff like that around you?—”
I snort. “Blaspheme all you want.”
“But aren’t you, like…one of them now?” Her voice is thin, and her wide blue eyes are almost frightened.
She’s nervous. Unsure of me, now that she knows the truth.
Damn it.
“Don’t look at me like that,” I insist vehemently. “Whatever I am, I’m still myself.”
I describe it all to her. How my purpose was unexpectedly fulfilled during the battle, how I found myself in Paradise, and then waking up in Syntyche’s desecrated temple with only blips of memories returning through the scythe I now wield.
“I did something to return to the mortal realm,” I finish. “I just don’t remember what I did, or why it took me six months to return. Having no memories is absolutely fucking infuriating.”
Kenzie looks down at her hands, picking at her chipped nail polish. “Yeah. It is.”
Right. That was insensitive of me—she would know better than anyone else.
I study her. “Have you been able to rediscover much about your past?”
She nods. “Turns out, I was a shady bitch back in the day. But even though I can piece things together and even though my quintet has been incredibly supportive as I rediscover myself, it still sucks that I’ll never get those memories back, you know? Gods, I wish I had a magic memory-returning scythe,” Kenziesighs. Then she wrinkles her nose. “Or, not a scythe. Something I’d actually use, like a badass paintbrush or something.”
The lioness shifter stares at me again, like I’m something new she’s never seen before. At first, I worry she’s going to treat me differently now that she knows my pedigree, but then she grins.
“So…you look almost exactly like Syntyche, huh? No wonder I always thought you were so pretty—you literally look like a fucking goddess!”
“Thanks for the sentiment, but you’re the only person who thinks that.”
“Oh, girl, no—Ipromiseall of your guys would agree with me, plus anyone else with the capacity to appreciate actual beauty.”
Her mention of my guys makes me notice the burning in my emblem-less chest again. Being back even this long without seeing them feels empty. If Felix doesn’t return soon, I’ll find a way to sneak myself into Everbound Castle.
Needing a topic change, I make a face. “Speaking of guys…Felix. That’s weird.”
Kenzie grins, back to normal, even though she keeps eyeing me more than necessary. I’m pretty sure she’s trying to picture me two feet taller and deathly pale with a cloak and scythe. But as long as she doesn’t treat me differently because of my mother, she can picture me naked for all I care.
“It’s not weird,” she disagrees. “Felix is so fucking perfect for me, just like the rest of my quintet. I mean, it might be a bit weird for you since Felix once told me he thought of you as a little sister, so it could seem like I’m banging your big brother?—”
