As the voices' laughter and ringing fade from my ears, I go silent when I realize my keeper is singing softly. It's an old, traditional fae lullaby I heard constantly as a very young child. It warms my chest immediately.
She's incredibly off-tune, yet I've never heard anything more beautiful.
"How do you know this?" I manage.
"Lillian used to sing it to me."
I don't know who Lillian is, but hearing the rough scratchiness of her voice makes me desperate to fix what I just did. I reach for the bruises on her throat, determined to erase them, but despair fills me again when I remember I can't even fucking heal her.
Am I truly so useless to the woman I love?
She frames my face with her hands. "It wasn't you. It was your curse."
"That's no excuse. You just woke up to your greatest fear. I deserve death—no, death would be far too merciful for me now," I grimace.
"First of all, that is hardly my greatest fear. If someonedidstrangle me, I'd revive and gladly repay the favor. Second of all, this isn't a big deal. Some people enjoy choking. Kenzie says it's kinky."
Gods above. How is she joking at a time likethis?
I cover my face. "Don't make light of this. Please."
"If you insist. Come here."
She leads me back to the bed. I don't want to sit down with her. What if my sanity ebbs again, and I do something far worse? I should retreat to my private dorm and wallow in self-hatred, where I pose no risk to her. There's plenty of hard liquor there I can try to drown my sorrows in.
"Silas. Sit."
"I need a drink."
Maven considers that. "Okay. Sit first."
I do, but I keep an arm's length between us. I feel wretched. Haunted. I will never fucking get the image of me choking the life from her out of my broken head. I always knew what my curse would be and always anticipated hating the feeling of slipping away, but this is far more torturous than I ever could have imagined.
I'd loathe the gods for doing this to me…but then again, they gave me my blood blossom.
So, even if I hate them right now, I'll always be in their debt.
Maven huffs and scoots closer to me on the bed. At first, I think she's going to offer sweet words or offer empty assurances that she's all right, even though I can see the motherfucking bruises.
Instead, my soul nearly leaves my godsdamned body when my vicious little keeper withdraws a concealed knife from her pants and drags it across her palm. I shout in alarm, but then the intoxicating scent of her blood slams into me, and I go dizzy with hunger.
Her dark eyes sparkle with daring. "You said you needed a drink."
"I—I can't…" My mouth aches. My chest is on fire, my heart thrumming with desire and terror. She can't let me do this. "No, I just hurt you. I won't do that again."
Maven's hand is now dripping, and she rolls her eyes before raising a red finger and wiping it gently across my lips. My tongue darts out on instinct, and?—
Holy gods above.
I'm on her in an instant, my fangs burying into her hand as lust and cavernous hunger roar through my veins. I immediately have her pressed against the bed beneath me, trapped. Maven's sharp inhale vaguely registers, but I'm too far gone from her breathtaking flavor to do anything except feed.
All magic tastes the same to me.
But not hers. No, Maven tastes like she'smine.
It's beyond all description as her magic lights up my entire system beyond any other power I've ever experienced. I moan and grind desperately against her. All of my instincts are dialed up to ten as I lose control.
When she groans and bares her neck, I eagerly sink my teeth there, eyes rolling back as her flavor floods my mouth.
