“I wish I was stronger,” she said, fervently.
He took her hand. “Don’t say that.”
She smiled sadly. He’d been saying that a lot lately.
“You can’t live here and fulfill your commitments to your family and your business.”
“No.”
“What then? We live a half-life where you bounce into Blessed Inlet between location scouting missions? I sneak up to Sydney when you’re in town for a dirty weekend? On those weekends when you have no parties to attend, of course, because I can’t do those. And what about Billy? He loves you. He would only be confused by it all.”
He nodded.
“So where does that leave us?”
He didn’t answer.
“One of us has to say it, William.”
“I know.”
“Are you going to make it be me?”
“I don’t have the strength to do it. You’re stronger than me.”
No, she wasn’t. She felt a lump form in her throat, choking her as tears welled in her eyes. She got up and wandered away, across the yard, heard his footsteps behind her. She turned to him, gripping his shirt front in her fists. God, it hurt. So much. He held her so tight she could barely breathe and yet she wanted him to hold her tighter still.
“I want you to do something for me.”
He loosened his hold marginally. “What?”
“Do it quickly.”
He took a shuddering breath, his voice tight when he said, “I can be gone tomorrow.”
She quivered. That was too quick, but really, it was just torture to drag it out, so she said, “Okay.” She turned in his arms and looked up at the moon.
“I won’t keep the lighthouse. Any ties I keep here are only going to torture us both.”
She sighed, leaning her head back against his shoulder. “Will you do one more thing for me?”
“Yes.”
“Stay the night.”
He blew out a breath. “Of course.”
They made quiet, desperate love and held each other all night long.
Juniper woke with a throbbing headache and a lump in her throat. She drew a deep, shuddering breath and pulled back to look at William. He was already awake, the look in his eyes devastating her. She reached up to brush the hair back from his forehead and he caught her hand, pressing a kiss to her palm.
“I love you,” they said at the same time. Juniper smiled sadly.
They heard the patter of Billy’s feet down the short hallway and Juniper saw the stricken look on William’s face before he masked it, greeting her son with a cheerful smile. God, her heart hurt. Billybounced on them both before moving to sit on William’s chest, laughing. But ever sensitive, he seemed to sense the mood, because he got very quiet, and leaning down, put his hands on either side of William’s face and said, “I love you.”
“I love you, too,” William replied huskily.
Juniper wasn’t sure how much longer she could bear it. “Why don’t we have breakfast?”
