Cassie looked lovely, dressed in a lemon-colored dress with a ballerina skirt and sweetheart neckline, her chestnut hair piled high on her head in an artfully messy knot. On most women it would look too girly, but something about Cassie’s businesslike flare forestalled that. “Come with me, there’s someone I really want you to meet.”
“Cassie—”
“What? I’ll look after her.” Cassie rolled her eyes at William before grabbing Juniper by the arm. It was impossible to resist her, so Juniper shot a strained smile at William before being dragged away. “I’m so excited. I was checking out your website this afternoon, after lunch, and I was thinking that hand painted stuff you sell is really something. Mum collects art so I know a bit about it. There’s this friend of hers, Martha, who is always looking for new talent. That’s her, over there in that hideous red dress. So avant-garde, you know.” Her laughter tinkled on the air as she pulled Juniper along. “Martha! Darling! So good to see you.” Air kiss, air kiss. “There’s someone I want you to meet. This is Juniper!” She presented Juniper with a flourish and Martha gave her a smile that bordered on a sneer.
“Delighted,” she said. She was a tall woman, clad in a red wrap dress, her black hair swept up in a beehive ‘do with a streak of red across the front.
“Juniper is an artist. Ssh, you are!” Cassie continued, smothering Juniper’s feeble protest.
“Oh, is that so? Which art school did you attend?”
“I didn’t, I ah…” Martha had raised her eyebrows with a look of such disdain on her face that the words Juniper had been about to utter died on her lips.
“Martha! There’s no need to look like that. Once you see what I’m talking about you’ll be all over Juniper like a rash.” She turned to Juniper. “Do you have a business card?” Juniper shook her head, not misreading Cassie’s flash of disappointment. “Right, well, I’ll be in touch, Martha. Trust me, you won’t be disappointed.” Martha nodded, and with a thin smile, turned away to greet someone else. “Oh, sorry about that. I forgot she could be such a cow. But she’s got the best eye in the business and if she takes you on, you’re set.”
“But I don’t really want to be taken on,” Juniper protested.
“Nonsense! Imagine the volume you could sell if someone like Martha Wainwright was sponsoring you.”
Juniper could just imagine it and it made her feel more stressed and anxious than she already was. She loved her little shop, loved her work, loved working with Leah. It gave her the perfect work/life balance. But she could see that there was no way of explaining that to Cassie, ever the businesswoman, looking for an opportunity behind every nook and cranny and if she couldn’t find it, she would make it happen. Cassie looked around the room, her eyes narrowing, obviously looking for who else she could introduce Juniper to. Gwen swept up at that moment, rescuing Juniper from one horror only to plunge her into another. A group of women; gathered together, turned to her as one when she approached with Gwen, there was no nastiness, it wasn’t rude, she could tell. Gwen had obviously told them she was there with William, and they were interested and curious. However, she felt like she was under a microscope with the way they were all inspecting her. They asked lots of friendly questions about where she lived, for details on how she and William had met, about Billy. A waiter came by, and she placed her half empty champagne glass on the tray. Her fingers were tingling so she didn’t think she should have any more.
It was with immense relief that she saw William approach. “That’s enough, Mum,” he said with a laugh. “It’s my turn to show her off now.” She fought the urge to snap at him that she wasn’t a piece of art, to be shown off. He slipped her arm through his and squeezed her fingers as he led her away. “Everything okay?”
“Sure.”
He stopped walking and looked down at her. “Are you sure, because you look a little pale?”
“No, it’s fine. I’m just not that great at these sorts of things.”
“You’re doing fine.” He pulled her over to yet another group of people and made the introductions. She fixed that frozen smile on her face and tried not to grit her teeth as she answered all of their questions. The conversation led, as it inevitably did at these sorts of functions, to what she did for a living. She answered and then the next round of questions – how many shops did she have? Oh, just one? What was her plan for expansion? Did she have an internet presence? Who managed her social media? Did she have top insurance cover for couriering her internet sales?
“Everyone, settle down. She’s boutique,” William said with a laugh. She looked up at him, a little startled at the dismissive tone she thought she detected. He grinned down at her, rubbing his hand up and down her back. He had that schmoozing, networking face they all seemed to wear, that slickness she’d first detected when she’d met him again on the beach. She felt like a curtain had fallen between them, thick and heavy. He leaned in, saying quietly, “I just need to go and check on my father. You’ll be alright for a minute?”
She nodded and he walked away, leaving her. God, she felt so thirsty. She took a glass of champagne one of William’s friends handed her, taking a long sip, but quickly placing it on the tray of a passing waiter. Her fingers really were tingling now.The sensation was disconcerting. She was trembling all over. “Are you alright?” One of the women asked her.
“Yes, I just have to…” she moved away, letting the sentence hang in the air. She needed to find the bathroom, splash some water on her face, calm her nerves. She looked around frantically as the noise around her seemed to increase, pulsing inside her head, rushing in her ears. She spied the bathroom sign and moved frantically towards it, pushing at the door, pressing her back against it once she was through. She felt warm all over all of a sudden and moved to the sinks, ran the cold tap over her hands, ready to splash on her face. She looked up, into the mirror. The person looking back at her didn’t look like her. The slicked down hair, the heavy makeup, the fancy dress. She felt a constriction in her throat, her breath coming in shallow gasps. Her heart hammered hard against her ribs. Her blood rushed in her ears, louder than ever. So loud it was causing her head to ache. She couldn’t get her breath and the woman in the mirror looked back at her, a stricken look in her eyes.
Dimly aware of the bathroom door opening, of laughing chatter, she turned away, looking in her little clutch bag for her lipstick, trying to look busy, like she wasn’t falling to pieces.
“Juniper?”
She stared at Gwen standing next to her, her face a weird white blob.
“Cassie, get William! Come on darling, it’s okay. Sit down here.” Gwen put an arm around Juniper’s waist and guided her to a big couch in the center of the bathroom. She couldn’t get her breath. She could hear her heartbeat in her ears, muffling Gwen’s words. Maybe she was dying? Was she dying? Billy. She felt the hot sting of tears in her eyes. Then William was there, kneeling in front of her, trying to take her freezing cold hands in his. She pushed him away. She was dying. She could see stars. Billy.
“Juniper!” William shook her roughly, pulling her attention to him. She looked at him. He seemed miles away, down a long tunnel. “Honey, breathe.” It was the endearment that pulled her back, just enough for her to be able to listen to him. “You’re alright. Just breathe. That’s it. You’re doing great.” His words were soft and soothing, offering encouragement.
She’d heard his voice before, just like that. When she was having Billy. She remembered. “William,” she whispered brokenly.
“I’m here, honey. I’ve got you. Just breathe a little more. Yeah, like that.”
She took one long breath after another, never taking her eyes off him. The rushing in her ears was subsiding. Her heart wasn’t hitting her ribcage quite so hard. He took her hands and chafed at them with his own. “Get her some water, Cass.”
“Maybe we should call an ambulance.”
William shifted to sit on the sofa next to her as Cassie brought a glass of water. Oh, that’s right. She was thirsty. She took a long drink. “God, she’s like ice.” He took his jacket off and laid it over her shoulders, pulling her against him. She pressed her face into his neck as his arms came around her. “She’s shaking like a leaf.”
“We have to get her out of here,” Gwen said, taking the glass from Juniper’s hand before she dropped it.
