“And Hunter,” I added, because I did know that Covington brother better than the rest, and Hunter’s devotion was unmatched. “I’m sure Finn too.”
“Sometimes, it feels like I can’t make decisions for myself. Like there’s this Covington mold, and I can’t get out of it.”
I thought about what I knew of Smith, and of Marshall, and of Hunter, and for the life of me, I couldn’t understand why anyone would want to get out of that mold. All the Covington men I knew were thoughtful, devoted, and loyal beyond measure. But I also appreciated that I viewed all of them and their lives from the outside. Smith was the one who’d lived it. He would know better than anyone else the burdens and responsibilities.
“Your brothers are smothering,” I tried, and he nodded, flinging an arm over his eyes. “You can’t figure things out for yourself because they’re always offering their ideas for you before you even get the chance.”
“How did you know?” he asked with a watery laugh.
“I know their type,” I said, noncommittally.
Smith groaned, rolling onto his stomach and folding his arms together beneath his head to form a makeshift pillow.
“Your fish is staring at that bowl like it’s heaven,” he said, the words garbled around his arm. “You should let them into it.”
I wasn’t sure if he was talking about himself really or the fish. Wasn’t sure if he was talking aboutmeor the fish.
“You’re right,” I agreed anyway, sliding away from him and scooting toward my dresser.
Careful as could be, I transferred Cassandra Jr.—which definitely felt like the wrong name—from their plastic takeout container into the forever bowl. As soon as they landed in the water, their tail frilled up and they swam in a circle before settling into a calm and quiet float in the middle of the bowl.
“How’re they doing?” Smith asked, crawling across my bed and propping his chin on my shoulder.
We both watched the fish hover in the water, and even though I didn’t know how to explain it, they just looked a lot happier in their new environment.
“Sometimes change is good,” I murmured.
Smith licked his lips, the movement gouging his chin down into the soft meat of my shoulder.
“Sometimes,” he agreed, then a long pause before asking, “What are you going to call this one? They’re not a Cassandra.”
“I know.” I tilted my head to the side to rest against his. “Phoenix feels right, but also too on the nose.”
“I’d say Finn, but that’s my brother’s name.”
“Feeny?” I tried. “Short for Phoenix, and we’ll just never tell anyone that?”
Smith nodded his head beside mine. “Feeny is a good name.”
We watched Feeny swim around the bowl, feeling out the space before making a big loop around the stalk of leaves. Yeah, the fish was definitely happy to be home, and I hoped that eventually I would be too.
CHAPTER 20
HUNTER
Ihadn’t heard a peep from Lincoln since he’d sent me that video before lunch. I didn’t know if he realized he’d sent me the hottest jerk-off video on the planet with an accidental love confession at the end or not, and I also hadn’t decided if I was meant to ignore it until he told me in person, or if I should say something about it the next time we talked. The video was enough to throw me off-balance for the rest of the day, the partnership offer was going to have me off-kilter for the rest of the week.
Getting out of work, my phone was still quiet.
Getting home, still quiet.
Just before six, Smith texted me a photo of a red and orange betta fish, so I took that to mean he was with Lincoln, and I didn’t know how that made me feel. Instead of trying to figure it out, I called Finn. It went to voicemail, but I was in the middle of leaving one when he called me back, and I answered that call on the first ring.
“Busy?” I asked.
“A bit, but…” He let that go unfinished. “What’s up?”
“Needed to talk to someone is all,” I said.
