Wesley showedup at my front door looking very near frantic. I stepped out of the way for him to come inside, and he dropped a black backpack at his feet, his whole face pulled into tight and uncomfortable-looking lines.
“What’s wrong?” I asked, worried that something had happened with Hendrix after dinner.
“We talked about boyfriends. Being boyfriends.” His brow furrowed, and I led him over to the couch, hoping if he sat down, he would relax and take a whole breath.
“We did.”
“I never…I never said yes.”
My throat went dry. “Did you not want that with me?”
I would have rather died than ask the question, but Wesley was clearly in distress and I knew it needed saying. I didn’t want him to feel trapped with me because of the things we’d done sexually, I’d honestly just thought I’d have more time to enjoy being with him before he changed his mind.
“No.” He paused and my heart sank to the floor. “No!”
“No?”
“No, like no you’re wrong. I do want that with you,” he said, turning toward me so quickly our knees banged together.
“So, yes?”
“I’m honestly confused.” Wesley let out a weak laugh. “What I meant to say is that yes, I want to be your boyfriend. Rather, I wantyouto bemyboyfriend too. Together.”
I pressed my palm against my sternum and forced myself to swallow down my earlier feelings.
“Right,” I agreed.
I didn’t want to admit that I’d thought of Wesley as my boyfriend the whole time. Even though he hadn’t verbally agreed when we talked about it, the questions he asked, the things we did, it all felt right. Like we were that to each other.
“Okay.” His shoulders sagged and he smiled. “My boyfriend.”
“Right.”
“Can we make out now?”
I laughed, shaking my head. Wesley had the most golden retriever energy of anyone I’d ever met, and the longer we stayed together, the more he rubbed off on me. I didn’t hate it.
“Yeah,” I told him, “we can make out.”
Without hesitation, he scrambled onto my lap and grabbed my face, crashing our mouths together. The fierceness of the kiss caught me off-guard and I gasped, Wesley using my surprise as an excuse to slide his tongue farther into my mouth. He had his hands cradled around my face, pinky fingers grazing against the sides of my neck, so I grabbed him around his hips, holding him steady while he deepened the kiss. He tasted like fire, groaning while he grinded his hips down against my cock, searching out my erection with his ass.
“I want to do more than make out,” he whispered against the corner of my mouth before leaning back. His lips were already pink and swollen from our kisses, and he let his hands fall away from my face, down into our laps. I still had a hold on his waist, and I dug my nails in, trying to stop him from making me harder than I already was.
“What did you have in mind?” I asked.
I’d committed to going slow with him, but it would have been a lie to say I wasn’t ready to try some more things with him. Sex still felt a little overwhelming to me, but I’d lost sleep thinking about what his mouth would feel like around my dick. Or mine around his. But I knew Wesley felt like that was a step past penetrative sex, so it would be a while until I got to experience either of those.
For his part, he looked a little unsure of how to answer the question, but I didn’t want to push, so I waited for him to come around with a response.
“I was thinking earlier about sex.” His lashes fluttered on the word and I wanted to protect him from the rest of the world at all costs. His eager innocence was almost too much for me sometimes. “But I don’t think I’m quite there.”
“No rush,” I assured him.
“I’ve been thinking a lot about it,” he said, cheeks turning pink enough to match his lips.
“What about it?”
“I talked to Gray about it and I think maybe I had it wrong before.”
