Freddy snaked his way toward the bar, and I watched him go, wondering if I was being too stringent in my decision to keep him as a friend and not entertain the idea of more. He was attractive, close to my age, and nice enough. A little smaller than me, but that wouldn’t be the worst thing ever. Beyond all of that, he seemed interested in me, which had to count for something too. Worst case, maybe he could be a hookup, because I hadn’t had sex since the last time with Rome and that was almost four months ago.
To call it a dry spell would be an understatement.
I lost him in the crowd around the same time I made the decision to see where the night took us. Unfortunately, that was also the same time my stare landed on a face I didn’t want to admit I recognized.
On the other side of the bar, Miles stood at a table like mine, posture casual and relaxed. He was with a woman, a change from the twink I’d watched him send off earlier in the day. She leaned close, talking incessantly, gesturing with her hands. He nodded like he was listening, but his eyes were focused on me. When he realized I’d caught him, his mouth twisted into a wry smile, and then Freddy was back.
Blinking quickly, I tore my stare away and smiled at Freddy, taking the offered rum and Coke.
“To possibilities,” he said, raising his glass.
I clinked the rim of mine against his and took a sip through the straw. “To possibilities.”
It was over for me after that. Even though I did my best to stay engaged in the conversation, the intensity of Miles’s stare was palpable. Every time I dared a glance in his direction, he was looking at me. Even when the woman had moved impossibly close, her hand pressed against his sternum and her lips inches from his neck. Even from across the room, I could see the heat flare in his eyes, but I knew it wasn’t for her. All of his attention was directed at me, focused on me. Worse than that, Freddy, for as much as he tried, couldn’t hold a candle to it.
Three drinks in, Freddy had moved closer to me. The potato skins did nothing to soak up the rum in my stomach and they’d done nothing to quell his interest in pursuing other options for the evening. Miles’s date had given up the round before, but he stayed at the table, eating French fries like he had no better place to be in the world.
“Can you excuse me?” I set my drink on the table and stepped away. I needed to breathe. I needed air.
Quiet.
“Sure.” Freddy smiled, completely unaware. “Did you want me to grab another round?”
“I don’t think so, but let me see when I’m back.”
The bathrooms were gender-neutral and the hallway that held them was packed tight with women waiting in line. There was obviously going to be no peace for me there, so I pushed past them all, using both hands to shove open the exit door at the back of the hallway. I expected it to lead into an alley, but instead I found myself on a small patio. Half a dozen wrought iron tables and chairs scattered around with crisscrossing strings of market lights stretched from the building and over the canopy. Only one table had people sitting at it, and I lamented that I’d been inside the whole time.
I took a seat at one of the tables, leaning back in the chair and pulling loose the knot on my tie. It wasn’t any tighter than it had been in the morning or for the hours after, but suddenly it was impossible to breathe.
“You all right, buddy?”
I didn’t need to see the face to recognize Miles had followed me out.
“I’m fine,” I snapped.
“It’s crowded in there.” He slid into the seat beside me like he didn’t have a care in the world.
“It’s crowded here.”
“Just the two of us.” He pressed his fingers against his ears a couple of times, scrunching his nose. “It’s really loud in there.”
“Loud here.”
“Are you sayingI’mloud?” He pressed his hand against his chest, and all I could see was the woman he’d been with earlier doing the same.
“Where’s your date?” I asked, not willing to entertain the course he was trying to take the conversation down.
“I didn’t have one.”
“That woman with you earlier,” I said. “Or the man you sent home this morning. Either one.”
Miles grinned at me. “That woman is my business partner’s secretary. I assume she’s off scheduling him a meeting or something.”
“You two looked cozy.”
“Did we?” He arched a brow. “Were you paying that much attention, buddy?”
“Jesus.” I scrubbed a hand down my face. “Enough with the buddy, okay?”
