“What?” Landon asked sharply.
Verity shook their head. “Nothing, nothing. So, what’s your plan?”
“He wants to see me this weekend.”
“Which night are you taking off?”
“I wasn’t going to.”
“You should,” Verity was quick to respond.
Landon scrunched up his nose. “I need to be at Rapture.”
“Are you insinuating I’m not capable of holding that place down for one weekend night? I’ve done it before. Remember the unfortunate sausage incident of 2017?”
Landon clutched his stomach, remembering his last run-in with food poisoning all too well. “I do, and I know you can.”
“Then, what?”
“Jesus, Verity. Will you give me a minute to think?” Landon threw his arms up.
“Definitely not. You overthink. You need to just go with your gut.”
Landon glared at the coffee table.
“What is your gut telling you?”
“To grovel,” Landon groused.
“Mmmn,” Verity hummed with a smirk. “Do you think that’s what he wants you to do?”
Landon wasn’t entirely sure what Gregory wanted, but he knew Gregory had far more willpower than he did.
“I don’t know if it’s what he wants, but I can’t imagine he wouldn’t like it.”
“That’s a good point. Seeing you on your knees is a beautiful sight, Landon.”
“What if the weekend gets here and he’s decided he doesn’t want anything to do with me?” Landon hated the edge of desperation in his voice, but he couldn’t stifle it.
What if he spent all week getting ready to offer himself up to Gregory only to be rejected?
What if Gregory didn’t want to play?
What if Gregory realized how fucked up Landon going to Columbia had really been?
“Stop,” Verity barked the word out as an order. “Then it’s his loss, and you’ve done all you can.”
“Verity.”
“Listen.” Verity reached their hand over Ed and grabbed for Landon’s fingers. “Any man who is going to hold decisions you made as a teenager against you isn’t a man you want to be with. If he’s going to dwell on who you were then, he doesn’t deserve who you are now.”
Landon squeezed Verity’s hand. They were right, and Landon wasn’t sure what was scarier to him—the prospect of Gregory holding the past against him, or the idea of him not. Because if he didn’t, if he was ready to move on, then there was the possibility of an actual future together for them, and that was terrifying.
How was a person supposed to react when a life they’d relegated to being nothing more than fantasy suddenly became a feasible reality? Landon wanted to embrace it, but the thought of knowing then losing Gregory for a second time was a tangible fear.
The decision was simple then, Landon just wouldn’t lose him. He would do what felt right, and what felt right with Gregory was to submit.
13
