“It was a group decision.”
“A group decision?” I choke, my voice high-pitched and almost unrecognizable to even my own ears.
My head spins, gut churning. It feels like I just got punched. Not only because of how blunt and nonchalant he seems about it, but because he never told me.
And I just spent hours talking with her, none the wiser.
I’m suddenly rethinking every single interaction from earlier. Was Reid looking at her that way I sometimes noticehim looking at me? Was she watching him through a lens of more than just his best friend’s girlfriend?
“It was a while ago. Before I met you again.”
“Well I would fucking hope so!”
He rears back, almost like he’s taken off guard at my shock. Why should he be? “You should’ve told me.”
He rubs a towel over his hair, another one tied loosely around his waist. “I just did. There wasn’t exactly a great time to bring it up.”
“I don’t care. I feel like an idiot. Like there was an inside joke the three of you were all a part of and I was ignorant to.”
“If you expect me to tell you about everyone I’ve ever slept with, we’d be here for quite a while.”
His words land sharp blows to my stomach. That old, familiar defensiveness of his underlines his tone. It makes my shoulder hitch.
“Well, would you prefer to give me an overview, or should I just expect that every woman I meet through you now you’ve probably slept with?”
His face hardens. “That’s not fair.”
It’s not, but my anger and insecurities flood the logical part of my brain. I knew he wasn’t celibate by any means, but I didn’t expect to be hanging out with a girl that he slept with, completely ignorant to their history together.
Especially not so soon after just losing my virginity to him.
“Whatever,” I say and drop the hairbrush to the counter. “I shouldn’t have expected that you’d consider my feelings in this. After all, you’re always used to worrying about your own.”
I take off toward the bedroom where my bag sits open on the bed, and I quickly grab my clothes. I slip my dressover my head as Reid follows me in there. “Are you seriously pissed about this right now? I told you. I could’ve just kept it a secret.”
“That right there.” I point at him. “The fact that you’d consider keeping it a secret from me just to keep yourself from having to face my reaction is just as much of a problem as you not telling me earlier.”
He runs his hands through his hair, clearly agitated. “Did you want me to tell you in front of both of them?”
I put my back to him, sitting on the edge of the bed to pull on my boots. “It’s not even—” I cut myself off, unsure of how to explain it to him in a way he’ll understand. “Whatever. I don’t think you should come tonight.”
“What?”
“I’m going to go by myself.” I finish zipping up my right boot and stand. My feet wobble, not from the heels. But I tilt my head back, feigning confidence I haven’t felt since his admission in the bathroom.
Frustration hardens every line in his face as he wars with himself, trying to keep his anger in check. “Are you being fucking serious right now? You’re making this a way bigger deal than it is.”
I grab my purse, phone, and keys because I’m sure as hell not coming back here tonight. Without another word, I slam his bedroom door on my way out.
30
Reid
I’m alone. Utterly fuckingalone.
The emptiness reverberates off the walls of my home, taunting me with the silence. Familiar panic, anger, fear, bubbles into my throat, and the desire to burn bridges to keep from feeling these things rages inside.
But I fight to keep it at bay as I pace around the house, going from room to room, floor to floor, then down to my gym and punching bag, hoping the physical exhaustion will lead to mental exhaustion.
