I sigh. I guess we can work this whole thing out in Italy. Vanya won’t be happy about it. She’s been on at us all about how we need to come together as a family in the face of political instability, so there have been endless meetings.
I take Nina’s hand. “So come back home and we can pack our bags.”
She pulls away. “We’re not going. I’m going. With Ava.”
Her words sink to the bottom of my stomach like stones. I feel a sense of overwhelming certainty. This is happening again.
“But…”
“You’ve had every opportunity to prove to me that this can work. That you can keep us safe here, even as your family disintegrates around us. But I have to face reality. You can’t, Art.”
She looks up at me and I see how set she is in this course of action.Her amber eyes are alight with determination.
Nina’s leaving.
All this time, all this chasing, and it hasn’t been enough. Myfamily, the toxic mess that pushed her away in the first place, is too much.
I can think of a million things to say. A million promises I could make.
The fire in Nina’s eyes tells me that it wouldn’t be enough.
“So that’s it?”
She nods, her lips pressed together, but her eyes downcast.
“At least look at me while you leave me, Nina.”
It hurts to meet her eyes and understand how serious she is. She gets to her feet and places a hand on my cheek, while I stand frozen, back to the door. Shellshocked.
“I’m sorry, Artyom.”
I take a deep breath and collect my thoughts. I guess this was inevitable.
“I’ve tried, Nenoka. I’ve tried to be enough to protect our family.”
She nods. “I know.”
“I won’t stop you. I won’t come after you this time,” I tell her.
“Good.”
My heart squeezes in my chest.
I slump against the door. “If this hasn’t been enough, it hasn’t been enough.”
37
NINA
Iexhale slowly, trying to focus on my surroundings instead of the feeling that my heart has been torn in half.
They say sea air is meant to be good for mental health, but I don’t think I’ve ever spiralled as hard as I have during this stay on the Cinque Terre with Lisette and Viktor.
The view of the sea is stunning. The rooms are lavish, even compared to Vanya’s estate. I’ve never been this close to getting a tan in my life — even if the equivalent for me is an increasing number of freckles spreading across my cheeks.
Yet none of it is enough to distract me from the emotional car-crash that is the only thing I can think about. The entire time I’ve spent here, there’s been an unshakeable lump in my throat.
I thought I would feel relief. Immediate, palpable relief that I’d kept Ava safe, that I’d taken her away from that house. The placewhere Art killed his uncle, the place where I ran from him until I didn’t.I could feel myself spiraling down to a place I didn’t want to go. I thought leaving could stop it.
