I studied him for a long moment, and he met my eyes directly, not shying away or hiding. I felt like I could see him clearly for who he was, and I knew that I was looking at a good man. That was what really mattered, right?
Someone might look at Trainer and have doubts about him because of the patch on the back of his jacket or his large stature, but that stuff didn’t really tell you anything. It made me think of Jeff. He was always well put-together, fitting in well with the high society types that he associated with. But on the inside, he was a monster.
Damn it.Wasn’t I going to stop thinking about him?
I didn’t know what to say to Trainer to let him know that I was okay with what he told me, so I reached out and took his hand. I hadn’t realized that he was tense until I did that, and I saw him relax. We sat there quietly for a while, and it was nice to just relax with him like this without feeling like I needed to fill the air with endless chatter.
The door of the library opened, and I turned, releasing Trainer’s hand. Dominic stepped out, looking far too worried. I hadn’t seen him with that look on his face since we moved here, and guilt flooded me. I should have realized that he’d be freaked out if he couldn’t find me. It probably brought up some stuff from the past that I didn’t want him to dwell on.
“Hey, buddy,” I stood. “I just stepped out for some fresh air. Are you all done in there?”
“Yeah,” he said, all concern disappearing as if it had never been there at all. “We read a book about elves.” He looked quizzically at Trainer, “Who are you?”
“Trainer,” he walked forward and held his large hand out. Dominic took it, looking suspicious. “I’m a friend of your mom’s.”
This was not how I would have had them meet. Actually, I hadn’t even started to consider how or when to introduce Dominic to a man I was dating. Until recently, I had no real plans to date at all.
Dominic turned to me with puppy dog eyes as Trainer released his hand. “Mom, can I go to Glenn’s house? Please?”
“Who’s Glenn?”
A woman had just stepped out of the library, and she smiled brightly at me when she heard my question. “That would be my son. Elaine Hargrave, nice to meet you.”
She stepped closer, like she was going to shake my hand, but stopped when she saw Trainer. Elaine’s emotions were printed across her face, and I saw apprehension there. She seemed immediately unsettled, and I had the urge to defend Trainer, to tell her that he was nothing to be afraid of.
“I’m Erica, and this is my friend, Trainer.”
Elaine refocused on me, “It seems that our boys have hit it off.”
I looked at Dominic and saw that another little boy had come outside and joined him. They were in the middle of an animated discussion about Spider-man.
“We’d love to have a playdate. I can take the boys to mine for the afternoon. Glenn is always looking for friends to share his love of comic books with.”
“Can I go, mom?”
I felt almost like a cornered animal as I looked from one hopeful face to the next. My instinct was to say no. I just couldn’t think of a good reason on the spot like this. I didn’t even know this woman, how could I trust her with my child?
“It would be no problem, really,” Elaine assured me. “I’ll give you my phone number so we can coordinate pick up later.”
“Well…” I had to put my fear of people behind me. “Okay.”
“Yes!” Dominic and Glenn both cried out.
“Fabulous,” Elaine said, pulling out her cell phone. “Tell me your number, and I’ll text you so that you have mine.”
As I rattled off the digits, I could feel Trainer watching me as if he could sense my distress about this situation. He stayed on the bench as I grabbed Dominic’s booster seat from the car and put it into Elaine’s minivan, which was conveniently parked beside me. I stood at the curb and watched them drive off before returning to him, practically collapsing on to the bench once again.
“You know, you could have said no,” he told me, confirming my suspicions about his perception of my feelings.
“And Dominic would have been heartbroken,” I shook my head. “He was so excited to make a new friend, and he deserves some good in his life.”
“What do you mean by that?”
I cast my gaze around, searching for a way to change the subject since I couldn’t seem to keep my big mouth closed. It landed on his bike.
“Would you take me for a ride? I’ve never been on a motorcycle before.”
Trainer didn’t respond right away, and I was worried that he wasn’t going to let it go, insisting that I explain my comment about Dominic. But after a few seconds, he stood and held his hand out to me.
