“I would never sleep with someone I didn’t want to,” Claire said. “That’s not me.”
“I know,” I said. “I should never have called you what I did this morning, and I’m sorry.”
“Stop!” Her eyes were wide and she had put on an indignant face. “You have to let me finish my apology.”
I had to smile, her expression was so funny. I nodded to indicate that she should go on.
“You were so easy to talk to that night, and the next morning was so fun,” Claire said. “I felt so guilty, but I also was consumed by the case. Then you invited me to the barbecue, and Iknewthat night the Outlaw Souls were clean. I could tell by the way everyone operated and acted that it couldn’t be you guys.
She breathed out, tears welling up. “And I know you might not believe me, but that’s ok. I know I fucked up by not telling you about the investigation that night. If you walk away and never talk to me again, that’s fine. I just have to tell you that what we did and said that night meant something to me. It was real and it was the first time I’ve ever felt anything like that.”
Claire was crying in earnest now. Tears poured from her eyes, and her cheeks and nose turned red. I had never seen Claire lose control. She was always so quick and composed. Her cries made me want to bundle her up in my arms and hold her for days.
“I was going to tell you in the morning,” Claire said. “I made up my mind that night that in the morning, I would come clean. I would explain everything and beg you to forgive me for lying, and then I hoped you might even help me. But it was so stupid of me to think what I had done was forgivable.”
She took a great heaving breath. Then she pulled away to wipe her tears from her face. My arms instantly ached with the desire to hold her again.
Fear, sharp and intense, raced through me. She was going to walk away now. She had confessed, and now she recognized that too much had happened for her to stay. She was going to leave, and I was going to miss her, because I wanted her.
I couldn’t deny it anymore. She had done what she did because she was Claire. She was passionate about her work, she was ambitious, and she led that misguide. But she always recognized her errors. She was the woman for me, and I couldn’t condemn her for being herself.
“I love you,” she said.
For the second time in an hour, my entire world stopped.
“I know it can’t fix anything, but it’s the truth,” Claire said. “I fell in love with you, and that’s why I went after Las Balas. I had to at least try and make things right. I know you might need some time, but I want you to know that I love you, and I want to fight for you.”
She clasped her hands in front of her chest and took one last breath. When she looked up at me, there was only one answer I could give.
I grabbed her to me and kissed her as hard as I could. It was fierce and messy, and I could tell Claire was shocked by her sharp intake of breath, but I needed her to know how much I cared. I pulled her against my chest, and Claire tipped her head back as she wrapped her arms around my neck and clung to me like she would never let go.
At last, I pulled away and looked down at her. Her lips were parted in a little O of surprise.
“I love you,” I said. “Everything you did – it’s forgiven, as long as you can forgive me for what I said this morning. I shouldn’t have stormed out, I should have listened.”
“Pin,” she gasped. “Are you – ?”
“I’m sure,” I said. “You are the only one for me, I knew it as soon as I left you, but I couldn’t admit until I saw you pepper spraying Wreck.”
Claire burst out laughing. I couldn’t help but smile along.
“You really shouldn’t find it so funny,” I said.
“I know,” Claire gasped. “I was terrified.”
Her laughter trailed up as she looked up at me. “But then you came. And I wasn’t scared at all.”
My heart swelled as I leaned down to kiss her once more.
“I love you,” I said. “I’ll never stop.”
Epilogue: Clair
One Year Later
I typed up my final note on my latest case and then leaned back in my chair.
This one had been a good one. A child had been missing for almost two years. Police had given up even though there was no body. I took it on a few weeks ago and today we found her. She had been kidnapped and wasn’t in the best shape, but she was alive and back with her parents.
