Eleven
Pin
I never really thought of myself as a fickle guy. Once I made up my mind about something, I stuck to it. I made my choices, and I never looked back or felt regret. I prided myself on sticking to my guns.
I wasn’t proud anymore.
Three days after hooking up with Claire, and I was doubting every choice I had made. I had sworn I wouldn’t reach out, but I kept talking myself in circles. Maybe she wasn’t as risky as I thought. Maybe we could keep it casual as long as we were really clear with each other.
I had gotten a taste with Claire and the day after I convinced myself that just a taste was enough. Now I wanted more. A lot more.
I had my rules and I had stuck to them for a long time, but I was no masochist. I wasn’t going to suffer forever. Surely one (or several) more nights with Claire couldn’t be dangerous. I would be on guard. I would be careful to keep it casual.
The only question was how to reach out. I had heard nothing from her, but that made sense. I was the one who had booked it out of her apartment. She probably thought I wasn’t into it. Which was so deeply untrue, it almost made me angry to think of Claire sitting somewhere imagining that I was ambivalent about our night of passion.
Not that Claire was moping. I hadn’t known her long, but I could tell she was not someone to suffer from low self-esteem. She probably had shrugged me off and decided to move on if I wasn’t interested. So it looked like I was going to have to make the next move.
As I took care of some accounting business in my apartment, I wracked my head about how to instigate another carnal meeting. The problem was, too much time had passed. If I had texted Claire the day after about how I had a good time, it wouldn’t be so out of the blue for me to text her today asking if she wanted to hang. Also, I had no clue how she had reacted to the night. She could be offended by a booty call. Or disinterested.
I shoved my work away and stalked across my apartment in frustrated strides. This wasn’t me. I didn’t overthink when it came to women. I never hemmed and hawed over how to phrase a text message. If I wanted to hang out with a woman, I usually just asked. If she said no, so what? There were other women for what I wanted.
I paused in my pacing and frowned. Why wasn’t that logic working anymore? There were still plenty of other women in La Playa.
But now the idea of simply reaching out to another past hook-up to see if she was game, or going out to a bar to try and meet someone new had no appeal. In fact, I downright winced at the thought of pursuing anyone but Claire.
She had gotten under my skin, that was all. We had chemistry. She was like a scratch I needed to itch. Once I was done, I would go back to other women. It wasn’t like I was addicted to her or anything. No one could fall that hard in just one night, especially not me.
I nodded. It was stupid to torture myself any longer by analyzing it. It was time to take action. Since a sudden text seemed too abrupt, I decided I needed a plan with a bit more subtlety.
I checked my watch. I was due to meet a few club members across town for a ride that afternoon. Kim was going to be there. All I had to do was ask Kim if she had heard anything from Claire. It was a normal question to ask. I had helped them out the other night. Kim might even volunteer information.
And if she hadn’t heard from Claire, I would suggest we all go out again. Kim could take the lead with organizing it. If all else fails, I would just tell Kim I was interested in Claire. Kim was cool, she wouldn’t tease. She had probably already guessed we hooked up, it wasn’t like we were being secretive.
Kim could probably sort the whole thing out for me. She could be a little nosy with Claire, find out where she stood, and then let Claire know what I wanted. Girls were good at that kind of thing.
Yeah, it was lazy and felt extremely high school to just let Kim play matchmaker, but I didn’t really care. All I cared about was repeating the other night.
I pulled on my jacket and made for the door, a new spring in my step. This was good. I was going to get in touch with Claire, enjoy a few more wild nights until I was satisfied. I would get her out of my system and then move on with my life.
The group was planning on just a quick ride around part of our territory to see how things were. Since the minor incident with the Las Balas dealer the other night, we were all on guard. It was unlikely we would spot anything during daylight hours, but it was good to make our presence known in case Las Balas was planning anything.
We met up at a gas station in Southern La Playa, just off the highway. I smiled as I pulled up and saw the dark curtain of Kim’s hair. She was chatting with Hawk. I walked over, nodding a greeting to Hawk.
“Hey, Pin.” Kim flashed me a cunning grin, and I could tell she knew or had assumed everything that had happened after we had parted ways outside the club.
“Hey,” I said. “How are ya after the other night?”
“Better than ever,” Kim said. “But I think Claire was the one who got lucky that night, right?”
She pursed her lips and raised her eyebrows. I chuckled and gave her a casual shrug.
“Are you just guessing or have you talked to Claire?” I didn’t want to beat around the bush. We were due to take off on the ride any minute.
“Claire did text me thanking me again, but I wasn’t going to pester her about you,” Kim said. “But I mean, I have eyes.”
Kim was using her eyes to study me up and down. “Did youwantme to pester her about you?”
I studied the pavement of the parking lot and willed my voice to stay calm. Like it was no big deal. I didn’t care either way.
