Cherry yawns loudly. ‘Sure, babes. Sure.’
‘Roger that,’ confirms Big Sue, looping her arm around Big Mand, who is gazing adoringly at her.
Tash sits on Sister Kevin’s lap and wiggles her bottom suggestively. ‘Just try and stop us.’
It seems the Dollz are feeling guilty over abandoning their posts this afternoon. This could be an ideal opportunity for me to put in for an early night, on account of thatcoldI have.
‘Great performance,’ Matteo says as I stand in front of him. ‘You must be… tired.’
Excellent. Matteo and I have become telepathically attuned. He is also trying to get out of the pre-moon shenanigans.
‘I amtired,’ I say, biting my bottom lip. I flick my hair over my shoulder and shift my weight, hand on hip, chest slightly thrusting forwards. This costume I’m wearing leaves very little to the imagination. I’m all legs and boobs. The black plastic bra top draws attention away from my flat stomach and very low-sitting matching hot pants, over fishnet tights and leopard-print high-heeled boots.
‘Tootired?’ he says, getting my drift. He must be recalling our energetic session this afternoon. That ceiling mirror really has been something of a revolution.
‘Nevertootired,’ I answer, twirling a strand of hair and looking coquettishly away. I hope to God we are not talking at cross purposes.
‘Christ. Get a room, you two,’ says Ged in a bored tone. ‘At least you’ve made a full recovery and you’re nottooTIREDfor tonight.’ His arched eyebrows are set determinedly in my direction. ‘Time to party. Let’s go.’
Matteo’s eyes are glittering with mischief as he shrugs in defeat.
15
The following morning, Matteo and I go over the schedule while we sit up in bed. We have been up since the crack of dawn to finalise the paperwork, confirm the booking for the gondola, choose a small flower arrangement for me to carry, and reserve a restaurant table for tonight. Something special as it’s our wedding night. Even though none of it is real, we thought it might be nice anyway. And in light of all the sneaking around and the Dollz with all their drama and Ged and Liam wanting to spend every spare moment celebrity hunting, we’ve made the grown-up decision that it might be best to just keep our quickie fake wedding to ourselves and get it over with without any of them knowing or us hijacking everyone else’s time.
‘What time are we meeting everyone to “do” the High Roller?’ Matteo asks me. He has a loved-up glaze to his eyes and his voice is oozing pure manuka honey. I have placed a giant pillow between us. It’s all we can do to keep focused.
I flick through the schedule. ‘I have a Happy Hour Cabin booked for an hour and a half’s time. They should all be finishing breakfast by now. Then once we get back to the hotel the plan is to lose them in the casino. Sneak back here to get ready. Go down to reception to meet our officiator, get married in the gondola, and float under the bridge at precisely 3p.m. All while the others are busy in the casino over in The Palazzo.’
‘And we’ll keep floating back and forth until we are sure that Birdie and Luke have seen us. I arranged for Birdie to meet with a potential client at the bridge. Did you message Luke?’
I nod. ‘That way, they can see we’re serious about each other, they’ll leave us alone and our careers will be saved,’ I finish for him. ‘We are geniuses.’
Matteo half smiles at this. ‘Desperate times, desperate measures. And you’re sure the Dollz and Ged and Liam won’t mind being excluded?’
‘Only if they find out. But honestly, it’s a nightmare trying to get them to stick to the schedule as it is, without rounding them all up for 3p.m. And don’t forget we’d then need to include them all in the wedding celebration at Caesars Palace, which might be a hassle,’ I say, justifying my actions. ‘This way is simple, just me and you and back here for our wedding night.’ A shoot of lust rips through me at the thought of Matteo seeing me in my wedding underwear. Just the thought of how he’ll strip it off me. What he’ll do. How he’ll do it. I swallow down the butterflies rising up from my stomach as our eyes meet. ‘Then tomorrow we’re on the Grand Canyon Safari all day for our honeymoon.’
This is the happiest I’ve ever been in my entire life.
‘Honeymoon?’ Matteo looks worried. ‘You do remember that this is all pretend, don’t you?’
‘Of course.’ I force a laugh as I adjust my sheet. ‘Of course.’
* * *
At breakfast, the whole group is sitting at the usual booth picking at a selection of pancakes piled high, drizzled with maple syrup and a generous side of crispy bacon. ‘At least we’ll be outside where it’s warm,’ Liberty is saying to Ged and Liam. ‘What’s the plan?’
‘I asked Connie to book us the Happy Half Hour Cabin with the full drinks package for Kev’s BIG birthday,’ trots out Tash, smoothing down her skintight gold metallic skimpy dress.
I take a second to absorb what I am seeing.What the hell?Tash has come dressed to kill. She is wearing red sky-high gladiator sandals, and her hair is perfect. Whereas we are all in full regulation Daytrip Barbie and Ken wigs, oversized sunglasses, pink check bucket hats with a photo of Ged and Liam on the front, tight white T-shirts with a photo of Ged and Liam on the front, hot pink short shorts and white knee socks. As per the effing schedule.
The Dollz are eyeing Tash up and down with interest and Ged is giving meWell? Say somethingeyes.
I am flabbergasted. Is it too much to request that everyone sticks to the arrangements? My mind flicks ahead to this afternoon.Apart from me, of course.
‘Erm, nice outfit, Tash. Very nice. But we don’t have much time before our turn in the Happy Half Hour Cabin. Are you planning to get changed before we leave in…’ I make a big show of checking my phone. ‘…thirty seconds? It’s booked for twelve. The limo should be outside waiting to take us there.’
Tash bursts out laughing. ‘You and that schedule. This is about Kev’s BIG birthday. It’snotabout the stag do. So, if anyone should change, it’s you lot.’
