Lena's face flushed. "That's not— No, I know you're competent. You're brilliant at what you do."
"Then why were you trying to convince your chief that I should stay behind?"
"Because…" Lena stopped, her hands clenching at her sides. "Because the thought of you getting hurt makes me panic. Because I've spent the last week trying to convince myself this was just physical or just stress relief, and I’ve been failing completely. Because you scare the hell out of me."
The words fell between them, raw and unguarded. Erin felt her anger dissolve, replaced by something softer, more careful. "I scare you?"
"Everything about this scares me." Lena's voice was barely audible. "I don't do this, Erin. I don't let people get close enough to matter. I don't worry about anyone but myself when I'm on a case. And now I can't stop thinking about whether you're safe, whether you're happy, whether you're going to decide I'm too damaged to be worth the effort."
Erin moved closer still, until there were only inches between them. "And what if I think you're worth the effort anyway?"
"Well, then you'd be the first."
The vulnerability in Lena's voice broke something open in Erin's chest. She reached up, cupping Lena's face in her hands, feeling the detective lean into the touch despite herself.
"Look at me," Erin said softly. When Lena's eyes met hers, she continued, "I'm not going anywhere. Not because of your job, not because of mine, not because this is complicated. I knew it was complicated the night we kissed at Lavender's. I knew it would be complicated when I said yes to taking this slow. But I also know what I feel when I'm with you."
"What do you feel?"
"Like I found something I didn't know I was looking for." Erin's thumbs brushed across Lena's sharp cheekbones. "Like Iwant to figure out what this looks like when we stop being afraid of it."
Lena's eyes searched her face. "And if it doesn't work? If I can't stop trying to protect you from everything, including your own job?"
"Then we'll fight about it. And we'll figure it out…or we won't." Erin shrugged slightly. "But we'll never know if we keep pretending we're just colleagues who occasionally sleep together."
A smile tugged at the corner of Lena's mouth despite the tears glistening in her eyes. "Occasionally?"
"Occasionally seems like an understatement at this point."
"Fair point." Lena's hands came up to cover Erin's, holding them against her face. "So what are you suggesting? That we admit we're falling for each other and see what happens?"
"I'm suggesting that we admit we've already fallen and stop being terrified about it."
The words settled between them, and Erin looked into Lena’s eyes, really looked into those hazel eyes that she saw shifted subtly between brown and green in the cabin's warm light, with flecks of gold that Erin had noticed before but never had the chance to study. There was still fear there, but something else too—a softness that Erin rarely saw in Lena.
"I'm still going to worry about you," Lena said finally.
"I'm still going to do my job."
"And when those two things conflict?"
"We'll figure it out together." Erin smiled. "That's what partners do, right?"
Lena's breath caught slightly at the word partners.
"If you want to be," Erin added.
Instead of answering with words, Lena closed the distance between them, her lips finding Erin's in a kiss that was different from any they'd shared before. Not desperate or stolen or fueledby adrenaline, but it was deliberate and certain. When they broke apart, Lena rested her forehead against Erin's.
"We should probably maintain surveillance," she murmured, though she made no move to step away.
"Probably." Erin's hands had somehow found their way to Lena's waist. "We could take shifts."
"Good thinking."
"I try to be thorough in my work."
Lena's laugh was soft and warm. "Among other things."
