“I’m sure this Jameson guy would be happy if you made that offering to him too.” Haven smirks and nods to the little black dress hanging on the back of my closet door. “You should wear that. Dress it down with that pale pink leather jacket and those tights you have with the lines down the back of your legs.”
My eyebrows pull together. “Why the tights?”
“Because they are bend-me-over-and-fuck-me tights, and you need them. I think that might help a lot with how tense you’ve been lately.” Haven purses her lips and props herself up on her forearms. “Have you tried that little rose vibrator I bought you? It’s the best damn one I’ve had.”
“It was fine.” I shrug and grab the dress. “I have other ones I like better, but it got the job done.”
Haven’s mouth drops open. “We need to get you laid immediately. If you think that vibrator was just fine, then your pussy has gone numb, and you need to get out there and have a little fun.”
She rolls onto her stomach, but something rustles beneath her head.
When she pulls out a piece of paper, reading it, before handing it to me, my stomach drops.
Hello, love,
Seems like you’re going out without me tonight. Bad idea, don’t you think?
I hope you liked the pictures I sent you the other day. You looked beautiful with your niece and nephew. I’ve been thinking a lot about the children we would have. However, you going on a date throws a wrench in that plan, don’t you think?
Personally, I wish you would cancel this date, but I understand that you have a few things you may need to get out of your system before we’re together.
I’ll be waiting for you, though.
Xoxo
Swallowing the bile that rises in the back of my throat, I take the note into the bathroom and put it in the sink. Then I grab a match and burn it, needing to see the edges of the paper curl and turn black.
Once the note is nothing but ashes, I wash it down the drain.
For a moment, I can’t do anything other than lean over the counter and try to catch my breath.
It’s like there’s a hand wrapped around my lungs, squeezing tight.
Haven hurries into the room, wrapping her arm around me and pulling me into her. Her hand runs down the back of my hair as I bury my face into her shoulder. “It’s going to be okay. We’re going to get through this together. You just need to breathe.”
“I don’t know what to do. If I tell Aiden, I’m going to lose all the freedom I have, but if I don’t tell him, then I just have to keep dealing with this.”
My breath comes in sharp bursts as I pull away from her and link my hands together behind my head, opening my chest and trying to calm down.
I pace out of the bathroom and across the bedroom floor, turning one way and then the other.
Haven sits on the edge of the bed again. “You might not want to lose your freedom, but can’t you see that it’s exactly what’s happening right now? You’re terrified to set foot out of your apartment, and I can’t blame you for that, but it’s not healthy either. This guy is making you scared to do anything other than sit here and wait for him to scare you again.”
I pause and look at her. “Maybe he’s just going to give up. I mean, nothing is coming of this relationship he seems to think we have.”
She gives me a flat look. “J, you can’t just sweep this under the rug and pretend that everything is going to be okay. You need to tell Aiden.”
My shoulders slump as I finally draw in a deep breath. “Fine. I’m going to go on this date because I need to show this guy that he can’t control my life, and then I’m going to go talk to Aiden.”
“Good.” Haven gets up and rummages through my closet. “Now, I don’t think the dress is the right move since you’re going to go talk to Aiden after this. You need to be able to kick his ass if he’s not willing to listen to you.”
I laugh and sink down onto the bed, my chest still tight. I don’t think I’m going to be able to relax throughout the date, but I have to try. At least a little.
I deserve a bit of fun before my life comes to a screeching halt.
Haven tosses me a pair of jeans I can move in and a blouse. “Keep that unbuttoned real low and hold it in place with a bit of boob tape. It’s going to show off your killer body and then when you have to hand Aiden’s ass to him, you can button it up so you don’t pop out a tit.”
“You know, I love how concerned you are about the duality of my outfit.” I force a smile but inside, I want to scream.
