There it is. The question Maddie has already asked me twice.
“Probably not,” I say, eyes forward.
She stops again, this time making me stop with her. “What? Why not? It’s Christmas.”
We’re right in front of her building now, big glass doors, lobby light spilling onto the sidewalk. She turns to face me fully, boots to boots, tilting her head up. Snowflakes are stuck in her hair.
“I’ve got stuff going on,” I say, which is the vaguest, weakest answer. “Work. Jobs lined up.”
She narrows her eyes like she doesn’t buy it. “Cole. It’s Christmas. Maddie will freak if you don’t come.”
I don’t want to talk about sitting on a plane, thinking about a woman who walked out and took half my plans with her. I don’t want to talk about showing up at my parents’ house and having my mom ask if I’m seeing anyone yet like she’s not worried about saying my ex’s name.
I shrug one shoulder. “We’ll see.”
She studies me for a beat. Then she does something I’m not ready for—she reaches out and lays her hand flat on my chest, right over my heart, fingers splayed on my sweater.
“You’ll be missed,” she says softly.
Heat shoots through me like I stepped too close to a fire. Her gloved hand is small. I’m supposed to tell her good night here. I’m supposed to tell her to text me when she’s upstairs. I’m supposed to remember that she’s Maddie’s best friend and she’s twenty-five and new here and I’m not ruining Denver for her.
Instead, I curl my fingers around the door handle and pull it open. “Come on,” I say, like I didn’t just almost cave. “I’ll walk you up.”
The lobby is blessedly empty. Just a Christmas tree with a donation barrel for kids in need this holiday season. Her boots squeak on the tile. I hit the elevator button for her. It lights up immediately.
She looks impressed. “Wow, it actually works?”
“Looks like it.”
The elevator dings and the doors slide open with a little shudder. She steps in, turning to face me, biting her lip like she’s deciding something.
“I still have cocoa,” she says softly, like she’s not ready for me to leave either. “And those marshmallow snowmen. If youwanted to… you know… come up for something sweet.” Her eyes flicker down my body, then back up as she blushes. “Of cocoa, I mean a sweet cocoa treat.”
Jesus Christ. She has no idea what she’s offering. Or she does and that’s worse.
I should say no. I should joke it off. I should tell her I’ve got an early start, which I do. I should remember the look on her face at the bar when she said she was lonely and not turn that into something it isn’t. Instead, I step inside the elevator with her. The doors start to slide shut behind me. And I snap.
I reach out, sliding her zipper down her coat in one fluid motion, my hand gliding around her waist to pull her toward me. Her eyes grow wide, her mouth parts, and before I can talk myself out of it, I’m lowering my head and covering that red mouth with mine.
She tastes like cranberry and lime and winter. She makes this needy little sound in the back of her throat that damn near undoes me.
My hands slide up, cupping her face, thumbs at her jaw, holding her there while I kiss her like I’ve wanted to since she opened that apartment door in her leggings. Her hands fist in the front of my sweater and she drags me closer, body soft and hot under that coat.
I press her into the wall, my body flush to hers, mouth moving over hers deep, hungry, nothing polite about it. My tongue presses against hers, my cock throbbing against my jeans. She moans, desperately and everything in my body is begging me to take her.
But I can’t, I won’t. I’ve done a lot of fucked-up things in my life. I’ve hurt a lot of people with my selfish actions, but I can’t take it this far. I can’t hurt Maddie like this. I step back, both of us gasping, panting, staring at each other like we’re waiting for someone to wake us from a dream.
But it’s not a dream and I was right… The gloss smears.
The elevator hums to life beneath us, a low mechanical groan that barely registers over the sound of our breathing. She’s still gripping my sweater, lips swollen, eyes glazed like she can’t quite believe what just happened. Shit, I can’t either.
When the car jolts to a stop, neither of us moves. The doors slide open to her floor, light spilling in, but we’re still pressed together, locked in that moment.
Step back, Cole. Walk away.
Instead, I kiss her again. Slower this time. Deeper. I bite softly at her lower lip before pulling it into my mouth to soothe. Kissing her feels like foreplay. My entire body is alight, on edge, tingling with the anticipation of what would normally come next with a night like this.
Her fingers curl into the back of my neck, and I walk her backward into the open elevator again, not even realizing I’m doing it until the doors try to close against my shoulder. I slap the button to stop them, but she’s laughing softly now, breathless.
