“I’m proud of you,” she whispers into my hair. “Go live a big, exciting, gorgeous life.”
“Only if you promise to come visit me and never replace me as your best friend.”
“Deal.”
We separate, both wiping at our faces like we’re not bawling.
Maddie faces Cole, chin wobbling. “Take care of her, okay?”
He doesn’t even blink. “Of course.” He grabs her and tugs her into him before we can see him cry. Maddie hugs him tight. He kisses the top of her head again, like it’s muscle memory. “Text when you clear security and when you land,” he says.
“I will.” She sniffles, smiling. “Okay, okay.” She steps away from us and grabs her suitcase from Cole. “I love you both. I’ll let you know when I land. Now, get out of here before she drowns in her tears.” She points at me, smiling at me one more time before turning and walking into the line.
The drive back is heavy and quiet. The radio hums an acoustic cover of “Let It Snow.” Outside, the mountains rise like folded blue paper, dusted in white. I press my forehead to the cold window, watching them blur by, wishing I could fold myself back into the moment before Maddie disappeared past security.
“You okay?” Cole asks after a few miles, his voice low and rough, like gravel smoothed by time.
I nod. “Yeah.” Quieter, she adds, “Just feels weird. She’s been my constant for so long. Every apartment, every breakup, every birthday hangover… she’s always there.”
He glances at me, one hand loose on the wheel, the other resting on the gearshift. “Yeah, just about every story I’ve ever heard from her involves you.”
That makes me smile. “We’re soulmates,” I say simply. “I’m not sure I know how to do life without her.” I laugh, wiping away another tear.
He hums, a quiet sound of agreement, eyes fixed on the road ahead. “You’ll figure it out. She won’t let you get too sad.”
I turn my head toward him. “You sound pretty sure of that.”
“You know Maddie, always finding that silver lining and turning a frown upside down,” he says, lips twitching.
A laugh bubbles up from somewhere I didn’t expect. “Fair. You’re not wrong. She always saw the positive in you too.”
The silence that follows isn’t uncomfortable, exactly. Just… unspoken. I sneak another look at him. His shoulders look like they’re a mile wider than that skinny, quiet teenager who was always dressed in black. The sun catches the stubble on his jaw, a hint of red in his beard. He’s not Maddie’s wild big brother anymore; he’s a grown-ass man and suddenly, it’s like I’m realizing that for the first time.
“So,” I start carefully, “why don’t you go home much? I mean, Maddie always says you’re too busy, but?—”
His jaw tightens almost imperceptibly. “Work’s here. Life’s here.”
The way he says it is final. I nod once, filing it away as one of those questions you don’t push. We fall quiet again. The highway stretches out ahead, curving toward the city. The radio shifts to another Christmas song, this one upbeat and stupidly cheerful.
By the time we hit downtown, the knot in my chest has loosened a little. My mind is now preoccupied and very overwhelmed with the thought of unpacking and organizing.
Cole pulls to the curb in front of my building and shifts into park. “Home sweet home,” he murmurs.
“Thanks for the ride,” I say, fumbling with my seat belt. “And for, you know, helping me move in. I’d still be lugging boxes upstairs right now without you.”
He huffs a quiet laugh, then reaches for the center console. “Wait.”
He grabs a business card from his glove box, flips it over, and scribbles something on the back with a carpenter’s pencil. “Here. My cell. If you need anything—or run into any trouble with the new place.”
I take it carefully, fingers brushing his for half a heartbeat too long. “Thanks, Cole. Merry Christmas… if I don’t see you again before the holidays.”
“Yeah. Merry Christmas to you too.”
I step out into the cold, the air biting my cheeks. By the time I turn to wave, his taillights are already disappearing down the street. I stand there until they vanish, card clutched in my glove.
For someone who barely talks, why does it feel like he’s going to start taking up space in my head?
CHAPTER 5
