I can’t help but roll my eyes. “Yes, I know that. But for the purposes of this exercise, I need to believe youcould.”
With a resigned sigh, Austin steps back. I’m convinced he’s not going to do what I asked. So convinced, in fact, that when he darts forward and grabs me, I’m not expecting it, and I freeze.
My heart hammers in my throat when he drags me to him, pressing the length of his sweat-slicked body against mine. “Breathe, baby,” he murmurs softly, leaning in close to me. “You’re okay. I won’t hurt you. Let’s try again.”
I swallow hard, my stomach damn near revolting at this whole thing. But Ineedit. I need to be able to stand up for myself. On my own two feet. I need to be able to prevent an attack. And if Damien ever comes after me, I need to be able to stop him too.
I force myself to take a deep breath. “Okay. Let’s go again.”
Austin steps back, and I study him, waiting. His muscles tense a second before he lunges. His face gives nothing away—not really. His only tell is the bunching of his muscles, but it’s a tell I’ve learned to watch for, that I’ve grown used to. A tell I’m good at seeing and anticipating, so when he gets close to me, I sweep his leg, knocking him to the ground just as quickly as Jasper did.
He lets out a soft grunt when his body slams onto the mat, andI smile down at him in triumph. “Gotcha.”
Before I can blink, I’m losing my footing—thanks to Austin sneak-attacking me—and crashing hard on top of him.
I groan, slamming hard enough against his body that I’m surprised I don’t hurt him.
His arms snake around my waist, and he flips me over, pinning me to the ground under him, my arms held above my head with a firm hand around my wrists. My breath catches for a second, fear and intrigue fighting for control of my body.
There’s an almost feral look in his eyes, and with Damien, that would terrify me. With Austin? The playfulness underneath does nothing but make me grin.
He would never hurt me.
With featherlight softness, Austin brushes his nose along mine. “Gotcha.”
I surge up, pressing my lips to his. There’s a near-silent moan as he kisses me back, and when Austin releases my hands, I immediately tangle them in the damp mess of hair at his nape.
I’m not afraid.
I’m not afraid, and I’m being kissed like Austin’s world begins and ends on my lips, in the shared heat of our bodies, in the slight hint of salt on our tongues.
A throat clearing loudly has Austin breaking away with a breathless chuckle.
“Alright, you two. No dry humping on the mats.” Jasper’s voice is full of humor and teasing, and even though I know damn well that I’m Austin’s best friend, my heart sings at the knowledge that he has Jasper too.
With a slight smirk, Austin climbs off me, then helps me to my feet. “You did good. Wanna go again?”
“Yeah, let’s do it,” I say, grinning up at him.
Anxietyandpride.
Those are the two things I seem to be made of. Anxiety about being out and about on my own. So far, I mostly just go to work and home. If I do need to go somewhere else, I do so with Austin or Arlo.
But also pride because I’m about to make my first car payment. On the very first car I’ve bought for myself.
There’s a pit in my stomach as I walk up the path to the building at the car lot, an itching along my shoulder begging me to turn around and look behind me—like I’m being followed and my instincts are screaming at me to make sure I’m not.
I won’t. Mostly because I know there’s no one there. Just like there was no one in the woods, and unlike that night, I will not feed into the fear. I won’t give it the satisfaction it wants.
Instead, I steel my shoulders, ignore the itch, and step through the doors.
Mandy, the woman who helped me with all the paperwork when I bought the car, looks up at me with a smile. “Hey, can I help you?”
I have to clear my throat before I can speak, but I’m proud of how strong my voice is when I say, “I’m here to make my payment.”
She gestures for me to come forward, typing away on the computer. “Name?”
“Luca Pierce.”
