“This is a glorious day!” Father announced, turning to face the congregation with his arms spread wide, his voice ringing through the chapel. “For the Light is merciful. Though Brother Silas has failed again and again to rise above his base urges, the Light has granted him reprieve.”
Silas jerked his head up at that, confused and hopeful all at once.
Father continued, “The Vessel”—he gestured to me with a sweeping, reverent motion—“will take Silas’s punishment for him.”
The shift in the room was immediate. A shockwave of hushed disbelief rolled through the pews. Mothers clutched their children a little closer. Men straightened in their seats. Some people began to cry.
I made eye contact with Jace, momentarily forgetting about what he may or may not have done. I was searching for comfort, but Jace’s normally calm eyes were wild, so much so that I flinched and averted my gaze.
I squeezed my hands against the arms of the Seat, trying not to let the trembling show.
Silas’s face crumpled.
“N-no,” he whispered, the word barely leaving his lips before it cracked. “No, please—no.” His voice rose in panic as Brother James and Brother Paul loosened their grip on his arms, unsure if they should release him or restrain him more tightly.
Silas surged upward, twisting out of their hold with surprising strength. “Father, please—I can take it. I can. I deserve it. Please don’t let the Vessel—don’t let him—”
“Silas,” Father said sharply, with the cold authority that always silenced a room. “Remain still.”
But Silas didn’t. His devotion to me—painful and loyal and heartbreaking—overrode everything else. He stumbled up the dais steps, reaching for the hem of my robe, like touching me might anchor him.
“Please,” he gasped, his voice thick with terror and guilt. “Please don’t do this for me. I can’t—You shouldn’t suffer because of me.”
My stomach twisted painfully. Silas’s fingers brushed the fabric near my ankle before Brother Paul yanked him back, pinning his arms once more.
Tears streaked down Silas’s face as he fought them. “Father,please! Let me take it. Don’t hurt him. Don’t hurt him because of me. I’ll do better—I promise, I’ll—”
“It is not your place to question the will of the Light,” Father thundered. “May this moment weigh on your mind for eternity. Watch, and remember the pain you have caused. Perhaps it will finally snuff out your sinful urges.”
Silas sagged between the men holding him, trembling violently, still struggling but weaker now—emotionally shattered.
He was willing to be whipped rather than let me be harmed.
He believed in me that deeply.
And yet Father didn’t even look at him anymore. His eyes were on the congregation—hungry for their awe, their submission, their adoration.
“The Light’s Vessel,” Father proclaimed, placing a heavy hand on my shoulder, “takes on the sins of others so that their spirits may remain pure. This is not cruelty—it is salvation.”
The crowd murmured in reverent awe.
Silas choked on a sob.
And I—for all my numbness, for all my dread—did not feel saved at all as Father helped me down from the Seat, and led me to where he wanted me to kneel.
Father and the men who were going to hold me in place debated amongst themselves on which way I should face.
Should I face the congregation so that my tears and pain become burned into their heads?
Or should I face away, so that I remain the calm figure they’ve always seen me as?
Ultimately, the decision was made, and I was to face away from the people. Brother James had pointed out that my cries would be enough to serve as a punishment; that way, they wouldn’t see my messy face. Father had agreed, and so I knelt and held my arms out for them to take hold of.
I wasn’t sure which way I would’ve preferred, but it didn’t matter, because it wasn’t my decision to make. I longed to be able to see Jace, so that I knew I wasn’t all alone. I wished I’d held his gaze longer.
I whispered a prayer to myself,“Blessed Light, I am your Vessel and your humble servant. Thank you for allowing me this act of mercy. Thank you for sparing our Brother Silas from this pain. Do as you will with my body. Help to keep me strong. Blessed be. Amen.”
“For the sin of impurity, of lust and filth, the Vessel will receive ten lashings,” Father said loudly.
