Only uphill from here, my boy.
Laughing, I close out of his text exchange to open the one I had with Audrey before I left. I’m tempted to text her. Ask how she is, and if the guinea pigs are doing well. What her word for the day is today. If she’s had any brilliant ideas for the charity event that could possibly replace a bachelor auction. Shit, I don’t think I even told her that was the main idea the board was behind. I hate all of this.
“Mr. Wahlberg, we’ll be taking off shortly. Would you like a drink?” Allison, the only flight attendant on this private jet, asks me sweetly. She leans in just enough so I can see partially down her blouse. I’m sure for most flights, she has each button secured perfectly. But for me, she’s giving a very clear indication of what services she’s willing to provide. I may miss a lot of social cues, but even I don’t miss this one.
“No, I’m fine, Allison. Thank you.” I grab a paperback I’ve been slowly reading through, effectively dismissing her. The saying ‘don’t shit where you eat’ comes into play here. Since I use the same company to charter jets when I need them, I’d undoubtedly have awkward run-ins with Allison after sleeping with her. Since I have no desire to attempt a relationship with her, no sex is worth months — or years — of discomfort.
Which is precisely why I shouldn’t be thinking about Audrey in any capacity other than an acquaintance. A peer I’ll be coordinating an event with. So what if she seems to understand a lot of my idiosyncrasies? Could be just a coincidence. Shedoesn’t know me. I don’t know her. The weird pull I feel towards her is just that. Weird.
Reclining my seat, I let my eyes flutter closed. It’s an over four hour flight from New York City to Denver, and I know if I look like I’m asleep, Allison will leave me alone. Typically, my mind whirls, forcing me to complete a series of steps to empty my brain and relax my body. But the last four days have been nonstop, and I’m exhausted.
My mind wanders to more personal thoughts of Audrey. I wonder if she has trouble falling asleep, or if she’s one of the lucky ones that goes unconscious as soon as their head hits their pillow. Does she let her hair down, or is it up in that bun? Would she let me hold her to fall asleep? I wonder what her hair smells like, and if she makes cute little noises while sleeping.
And that’s how I fall asleep: dreaming about a woman I barely know, and one I probably won’t ever get an opportunity to have.
Another week goes by with no word from Audrey. I’ll admit, I’m struggling hard. I can’t decide if I should reach out to her again. Google was no help on the matter, and basically told me to ‘match her energy,’ but I don’t know what the hell that means! I found forums that revolve around dating rules, and everything contradicted each other. The man should do all of the wooing. It should be even between the pair. The woman controls the conversations. Contact the woman the day after meeting. Three days. One week. Don’t appear too interested. Show her minor interest. Suffocate her with love immediately.
I’m analytical to a fault. I like knowing the steps of things. A plus B equals C. Black and white. Dating is so deep into the gray that I don’t know how to move forward.
Jesus Christ. I’m not dating the girl.
I need to get that through my thick skull. I only need to contact her about the event.
Mind made up, I fire off a semi-professional text and hope for the best.
Me
Hello, Audrey. I hope you’re doing well. I’d like to schedule a time we can meet to discuss the event. I have some new marketing images I can share with you, and tell you about what the board wants to do. This week, I’m available any evening.
I’m surprised when I see the dots immediately moving, telling me Audrey is responding.
Audrey
Hello, Jamie. I wondered when I’d hear from you again. Is there any chance you could come to my home to meet? My dog just had surgery, and I don’t want to leave her alone in the evenings.
Me
Of course. May I ask what she had surgery for?
Audrey
She was hit by a car a few years ago before I adopted her. Her spinal cord was severely damaged, paralyzing her. Surgery today was a follow-up to reduce pressure.
Me
Wow. You have a paralyzed dog.
Audrey
Yes. And five guinea pigs.
Me
Now I really want to come to your house, just to experience the zoo.
Audrey
It feels like that sometimes, especially when Flash gets the zoomies.
