He turns around with a grin. “Dancing?”
“We danced one night, and it was fun,” I admit.
Henry cocks his head.
“Sorry you all had to see that,” I say to Dad, still standing in the doorway.
“Was that A.D. Hemmings?” Dad asks. “You didn’t tell mehewas August Dansworth.”
“I didn’t think you’d know who Hemmings is.”
“I’ve given GaylordBlood Oathso he can read it before the telly series comes out,” Ms. Fernsby says proudly, returning to his side.
“Ms. Fernsby, I’m sorry that was so unpleasant.”
“Never you mind that. I knew he did something to hurt you. I don’t care how handsome he is—he showed up here trying to win you back, and he’s smeared up with some trollop’s lipstick.” She shakes her head, chuckling. “Lizzie, you shouldcheck the tabloids...this feminist is making quite a name for herself roasting him online. Her account is incognito with a clever name—BluestockingBadass—andeveryonewants to know who she is! He ignored it for a while, but it got under his skin the other night and he went off at her, and he was quite sexist. I’m sure a good many women right now want to shoot a Nerf gun at his willy!”
Henry laughs softly from beside me.
“Ms. Fernsby!!!” Heathcliff yells from upstairs.
“Oh dear, I promised Heathie we’d have a nice bubble bath and read a story. He’s anything but patient.”
As Ms. Fernsby hurries upstairs, Dad pushes his glasses up on his nose. He catches my eye and clears his throat. “Good work, Lizzie,” he says before letting the kitchen door swing shut to follow Ms. Fernsby.
Alone again, Henry and I stare at one another in the darkness. Moonlight streams in through the damask curtains, highlighting the knots in the polished walnut floorboards. We’re standing very close.
“Was he a diversion?”
“I thought he was a fling for a bit. It all started really quickly, but he’s a textbook playboy.” Tentatively, and then more bravely, I touch Henry’s arm. He’s broader than Philip. Different. Henry’s familiar, known, and yet new to me inthisway. I need another couple of breaths to remind myself that I do know how to fall in love again, and this isn’t betraying Philip.
This—all of it—is okay.
He puts his hand on my cheek, thumb caressing my jawline.
And then I pull him into a kiss worthy of any Brontë sister’spage. Following the Victorian rule book was a good crutch. But now I need to follow my gut. Nothing can erase my love for Philip, and nothing is wrong with me falling in love with his best friend. Dansworth was the distraction, the side plot that allowed me to explore romance again. That was less intimidating than what I have with Henry—something real and grounded.
The cuckoo clock ticks from the mantelpiece. Heathcliff runs on the floorboards upstairs as Ms. Fernsby draws his bathwater. Lucy scampers into the parlor with us, scattering LEGOs and Nerf bullets.
I push it all to the margins and kiss Henry.
@ADHemmings:*noir-filtered photo of a scotch* Learning that the creative life can be both glorious and lonely. #writerslife
@BluestockingBadass:@ADHemming Awww... the Sex God is lonely tonight. Probably wasn’t a smart move to insult women everywhere.
@ADHemmings:@BluestockingBadass I told you to sod off, you pernicious woman.
@BluestockingBadass:@ADHemmings I will not be silenced, you pretentious baby.
We stay up late into the night eating Ms. Fernsby’s blueberry pie. We talk a little about everything: Philip, nutty Mirabel, Ginger’s dog, Zoie. He tells me about Zoie’s ill-fated encounter with the alligator at Lake Marion, and I pretend I’m hearing the story for the first time. The conversation takes a turn as he tells me how unsuited he and Ginger were to one another.
“Why did you stay?”
He dips his spoon into melting soy ice cream. “We just couldn’t ever get on the same page. We tried. Year after year. She was the braver one for leaving.”
He rubs his temples wearily. “Once the movers left, I felt a little lost. When she walked out, I asked her what we were supposed to do. She said,Nowwe can learn who we really are.
“And that’s what I’ve been doing these past months—fishing with Bonnie, reflecting on my friendship with Philip. I realize now I knew what it was all along. I should have had the courage ten years ago at my own goddamn reception to see I didn’t have it with Ginger.”
