Sure, it’s possible, but it doesn’t feel right. That’s not who he’s been lately.
If we’re going to make this work, I have to trust that he won’t mess it up again.
“Hey,” Alek murmurs, gliding me around gently to cup his hands around my cheeks.
His thumbs swipe along my cheekbones as he gazes into my eyes. “I didn’t invite them. I promise.”
It’s the panic and fear in his voice that snaps my defenses. For a moment, guilt mixes with my worry that I made him think I didn’t believe him. As I blink up at him, I see defeat cloud his expression, and my own feelings shift from suspicion to empathy.
“I know you didn’t,” I reassure him.
His brows flash together. “Wait. You do?”
I give him a side smile. “Of course.”
“Thank fuck,” he whispers, brushing a kiss along my nose. “They don’t matter. Just you and me.”
“Do you miss them?” I ask, curious.
“I miss David.” He shakes his head. “Sort of. I don’t know, Vin. It’s weird, you know? He was my best friend, but I realize he had his own issues that he brought to our friendship. My relationship with them was as full of toxicity as the one I grew up around.”
“Do you think you’ll ever want to be friends with them again?”
He searches my face for any indication of how I feel, but he won’t find anything but genuine curiosity.
“Jerica, never. There’s nothing I miss about her or our friendship. David…I wouldn’t rule it out if he gets help and apologizes to you for how he treated you.” I open my mouth, but he places a finger over it. “I’m responsible for it all, but they could have treated you better.”
“And you never questioned them,” I chide gently.
“You’re right, and I apologize for that. To finish answering your question, as much as I’d consider it, I don’t think I ever will. Not like we were, anyway. Where David goes, Jerica follows. That’s not the friendship I want.”
Lifting to my toes, I brush my lips along his jawline. “Apology accepted. Now, hold my place. I need to use the restroom.”
I mull over Alek’s answers, sifting through my feelings. The problem with his friendship with David has always been Jerica. Alek’s blind spot for their behavior made me uneasy. When Aleksaid, 'Where David goes, Jerica follows,' the truth hit me anew. A friendship with David means inviting her back in, and I’m not sure I could ever accept that. The trust and boundaries between us were shattered, leaving me cautious. Even though Alek played his part in the breakup, Jerica knew he was taken when she kissed him, never realizing I’d already ended things until Alek found the apartment empty. Sorting through regret, resentment, and understanding, I realize too much damage has been done.
I just can’t get behind a woman who would knowingly do something like that.
So while David isn’t really the problem, Jerica definitely is.
Looks like this is a conversation we’ll have to revisit before long.
I’m washing my hands when the bathroom door swings open. I don’t need to look up to know it’s her. The air thickens with expectation, heavy with unsaid words.
I’d rather avoid her entirely, but I know I won’t escape this room without hearing her out.
With a sigh, I lean against the sink and fold my arms over my chest. “Look. I’m going to be straight with you. I don’t want to be here doing this with you. I’d rather get back to my date with Alek. You’ve obviously got some things to get off your chest. It’s not my job to appease your needs, but you’re lucky, or maybe not so lucky, because now that you’re in front of me, I want to speak my peace as well. So, say what you have to say.”
Jerica stands there, wringing her hands, mouth opening and closing. I let her flounder. She wanted this, so she can find her own words.
“I’m sorry,” she blurts before exhaling heavily. “I haven’t gotten to say that to you yet. The way I treated you was unfair. This isn’t an excuse, but we have a lot of unresolved things from our childhood. It led to a lot of toxic behavior from David and me. Outside of David, Alek was the only person who had everbeen there for me. I won’t lie to you, Hayvin. I took advantage of that anytime I could. It was an ugly thing for me to do, and it was totally unfair to you. I knew Alek was using me, and I let him because it meant he hadn’t abandoned me completely.”
“You want to know something funny? If you’d have made an effort all those times I tried with you and David, this conversation might be going another way,” I inform her.
“It’s possible, but the truth is, Hayvin, I was going to be the same person I’d always been unless I healed the parts of me that were broken.”
I sigh, conflicted. I want to feel nothing for the girl in front of me, but against my will, pity creeps in to complicate things.
“Look. I don’t hate you. That’s a power I won’t give anyone over me. I’m just going to have a hard time ever liking you. We won’t be friends. Ever. You did a lot of stuff that, as a woman, hell, as a human being, I just can’t get behind. I understand you had an ugly childhood, but that only excuses your behavior for so long. There has to be a point when you choose to become a better person. I overheard you that day, you know. The one when Alek walked away from his friendship with you and David. I commend you for finally recognizing the toxicity in you and your brother. For us, and more than likely for Alek and David, it’s just too late to make much of a difference between any of the relationships. You kissed him, Jerica. You did it knowing, or at least believing, I was still at home waiting for him. You put your mouth on a man who didn’t want it, didn’t ask for it, and supposedly was taken. Do you know what would happen if the roles were reversed?” I shake my head. “Anyway, I may have broken up with him before he left that day, but you…didn’t…know…that. So, why?”
