Something tells me I’ll like myself even less once I’m done slogging through my own mind.
So We Let Them Speak
Keaton | The Past
Justaswe’reaboutto step into the police station, Alek’s phone buzzes. He flashes a sly grin at Charlie and me before picking up. The call is over in a heartbeat, barely a handful of words from Alek before he pockets his phone and faces us again.
“Work calls. Do you think you two can manage this on your own?” he asks us both, but his eyes are on Charlie, letting me know who he’s really concerned about.
When she nods, he turns to me. “Can you get her home safely?”
“Charlie? Is that okay with you? If you’d rather Uber, I’ll pay for it,” I say, not wanting to take any more choices away from her than I already have.
She worries her bottom lip, and I clench my fists, fighting the urge to reach out and gently free it from her teeth.
Finally, she blows out a breath. “Yeah, that’s okay.”
Alek draws Charlie aside, steady hands resting at her hips. I know I should look away, but I can't. Their quiet exchange isprivate, their affection evident. Charlie's hands rest on his chest, her smile serene. She seems happy, or at least at peace.
When I can’t take it anymore, I turn away and drift toward the station steps. I sink down, burying my face in my hands, giving my heart a moment to catch up with the truth my mind is starting to accept.
Charlie Henderson doesn’t need Keaton Carr anymore. She’s unfolding into her own beautiful self, and I’m just a witness to her becoming.
“I’m sorry,” her quiet voice washes over me from above, and I shiver at the spark of pleasure when it does.
But then her words register, and I’m jumping to my feet. “What? Why the hell are you apologizing?”
“For you having to see us like that.”
“Fuck, Charlie. Don’t apologize for being happy. That shit will never require an apology to me.”
“I’m still sorry you had to see it, Keaton. I know from experience it's not the easiest thing to see.”
I shove my hands in my pockets and tilt my head back to the sky as I blink away the tears that want to fall. But then I glance back down at her. “How the fuck can such an ugly world hold something as good and as beautiful as you?” I ask gruffly.
She shrugs, looking uncomfortable. “I’m just human, Keaton. Don’t put me on a fucking pedestal. I’ll fall off every time. Come on. Let’s get this done.”
The process doesn’t take as long as I expected. Before we know it, we’re walking out the doors feeling positive thatsomethingwill be done.
Charlie messes around on her phone for a second before sliding it into her bag and grabbing mine. “What happened to your other phone?”
My body tenses at the question, but I know I'd better give her complete honesty to any question she asks. More than that, I want to be completely transparent with her.
“I lost it that day when I went to Rianna’s.”
She flinches, and all I want is to wipe the last year clean. If I could do it over, I’d have turned my back the moment I felt that pull toward Rianna.
Hindsight is twenty-twenty.
Now all that’s left is to live, learn, stay humble, and try to be better in every way I can.
“So, you actually went to her house that day. Color me shocked.” Charlie passes the phone to me. “Thanks for actually being honest, I guess.”
“I always will be from now on, Charlie,” I say quietly. “I’m sorry. I’ll say it as many times as I need to, but as you said, they’re just words from once deceitful lips. You’ve got no reason to believe me until I canshowyou how much I am.”
Silence settles over us on these steps. I know I should say we should leave, but the idea that this might be the end keeps the words trapped in my throat.
I glance over and see her biting her bottom lip again, leaving it red and bruised. I can’t bear the thought of her hurting herself, not anymore.
