So much anger.
Well, hello step two.
Rebecca told me I would eventually go through each step of the grieving process, but I was stuck between denial and anger for the last two months, and I thought I'd never settle on one. She said that for each step I reach, I'm another step closer to healing and moving on, and that I should embrace each one.
"Actually, no. I'm good. Thanks for giving me a lift home."
"I've got to go out of town for the weekend. We have a business that I have to look into."
"You and David?" I ask, leaning against my door jamb.
He nods. "And Jerica."
I tilt my head as I stare at him. There was something in his tone just now when he mentioned her name. Curiosity, perhaps? "It's her, isn't it?"
"What?"
"The person you have feelings for."
He chuckles. "Don't be ridiculous. She's like my little sister, Lollie. The only person I feel anything for is you. A big dose of fucking lust."
I roll my eyes with a smile. Denial. I'm pretty familiar with it. This is something he'll need to come to terms with on his own,though. Who knows? Maybe the weekend away together will open his eyes.
"You're a goof," I reply. "Let me know when you land safely?"
"Of course. I'm only a phone call away if you need me." He reaches out and tweaks my nose. "And think about that date, yeah?"
For the first time since catching Keaton with Rianna, the idea of telling him I’m going on a date with Alek sends a wicked thrill racing up my spine.
Embrace each one. Well, Rebecca, it looks like anger's winning out today.
"I'll go. If you come back and still want to go, then I accept," I tell him before I lose my nerve.
"You'll go?"
"If you still want to when you come back. Just as friends," I feel the need to clarify.
Classifying it as anything else right now will have me running for the woods.
"Friends," he repeats, stepping closer.
"Yep," I confirm with a nod.
"Who kiss," he murmurs, dropping his head closer.
"Who kiss."
Oh, if only Keaton were having to see Alek attach himself to my mouth right now. Would it send a knife through his heart? Would it rip it from his chest and leave it lying at his feet? I hope so because I don't think he quite understands the pain he's put me through.
Alek bites my lip, yanking my thoughts back to him before his tongue steals its way inside, proving to me that no matter how Keaton made me feel, I am still desirable.
It stings that it took someone else to remind me I’m still wanted, instead of the fucking asshole I can’t seem to stop loving.
Angry Enough To Hope It Hurts
Charlie | The Past
Freshfromtheshowerand with a satisfied stomach, I burrow under my covers, scrolling for the perfect show to fill the quiet.
