“What will it mean?” she whispers, her big brown eyes watching me closely.
I lean in and drop my forehead to hers, cradling her jaw in both hands. “Everythin’, Dee. It’ll mean everythin’”
11
DEE
September
“What will it mean?”
“Everythin’, Dee. It’ll mean everythin’.”
Toby’s words are still playing through my head weeks later. I didn’t know what it meant then and I still don’t know. I’m on the fence as to whether I’mreadyto know because whatever it is, it feels epic, huge,life-changing. Because of all of that, I think Ineedto know. I just don’t know how because the man in question is out of town visiting rodeos and transporting some new stud bulls back here on his return trip. .
Those of us left at the ranch have been working long hours to make up for being short of people, so after a few weeks of hard days back to back, today Red decided we were all due some down time.
That’s why I’m in my new favorite reading spot on the ranch house's porch swing. It's a nice spot to just sit back and enjoy the peace and solace found just watching the fields and mountainsstretched out before me. The light breeze rustling through the ranch and past me with the welcoming scent of dirt and grass andhome, also helps.
As has become a bad habit of mine lately, my thoughts distract me from the book in my hand, and the topic of choice is the man of the hour.
What does ‘everything’ mean? Why would a strong, confident, open book of a man like Toby Graham suddenly turn so cryptic? Was he talking about a relationship? About love? My pulse speeds up atthatparticular thought, but I can’t help it. What if I'm reading too much into it? What if I've misinterpreted his intentions?Or what if I haven’t?
We're all friends here. Not just me and Tobes, but the rest of the ranchers and their wives too. Is my inexperience at dating and unwillingness to take a chance on things without knowing where they’re leading going to hold me back–or worse–ruin what's turning out to be the best thing I've done in a long time, at the best place too?
This ranch, this town, the people, everything, it’s all a perfect fit for me. That’s not to say I can stay here forever, but then again… why couldn’t I? We never talked about an end date when the ranch took me on. It’s pretty open ended and all up to me.
I never thought I’dwantto stay in one place for the long term, but maybe there’s something to be said about learning something new about yourself–like realizing something you need in your life. Or maybe it’ssomeone… Just thinking about the man has me brushing my fingers over my lips. Maybe he’s a bad kisser, is that why he pulled back at the last minute?
I snort to myself and shake my head. There’s no way a man like Toby Graham could ever be bad atanything. This is the man who bought me supper in bed because I was unwell. Who saved me from the peeping duck without even sneaking a peek, not even once. And the same man whose sole mission in life is to put a smile on the faces of those he cares about.
"Ugh," I groan. “None of this is helping.” I return to my book, deciding to try some reverse psychology on myself and try to distract myself from my thoughts with reading.
I’ve been working my way through Aster Hollingsworth’s mountain men romance books and now I'm moving on to her cowboy series. What's puzzling me is that the more I read, the more it seems somewhat familiar to me. There are even animals in the book that seem to think they’re humans too, just like Duck Norris and Nelly do. It has to be a coincidence.
I pick up my phone and call the only person I know who’ll give it to me straight, even if it’s stuff I don’t want to hear.
"Hey, Mom."
“Hey there, darlin’. How are you?” she replies.
“Good. I’m good. The weather’s startin’ to turn so I’ll be able to use all my ol’ Montana gear soon.”
“You could just come back to Montana and we’ll keep ya warm,” she teases. “We’ve got lots of wood and blankets. Your favorite Mom meals…”
“Mom…”
She sighs. “I know. Can’t blame me for tryin’. I miss ya something fierce, Dee. We all do.”
"I miss y'all too. But I also feel at home here. I can't explain it. It's just…"
“You fit there. It’s as simple as that.” I can hear the smile in her voice.
“Yeah…” I sigh. “How’s Dad and those crazy brothers of mine?”
“They’re all keepin' me on my toes, but what's new. They've been keepin’ me busy since the day they were born. Your father just enables them. Enough about home. Tell me what’s been goin’ on there. The last time we spoke it was after the weddin’. Have Landry and Star come back from their honeymoon?”Moms, they never forget anything.
“Well they went a scenic route to their last rodeo event for the season, and Toby followed after them a few days later to get a new bull for the stud and to attend to some other ranch stuff. They’ve been gone for about three weeks now.”
