He could look back on Regina’s words with muted amusement now. Last night, however, he hadn’t found them the least bit funny. He was still too mangled by his guilt to see reality.
“I love her, Farah. In a way I never thought I’d be able to love a woman. She pulls out these gnarled old parts of me and buffs them to perfection until they are shiny and new. I’ve been so afraid to love her for fear of losing her and for fear of disrespecting your and Charlie’s memories.
“It’s been hard for me to see this, but she made me realize love doesn’t have to be an either-or situation. It can be a both-and. I can mourn your loss and still be angry with you for what you did to me. I can hold the love I had for you and Charlie in my heart and still love Regina and the child we’ve created completely.”
He kneeled, swiping his hand across the cold stone and smiling reverently at it.
“So I’ve decided that’s exactly what I’m going to do.”
Tears filled his eyes, painting the headstone in a shimmering cascade. He cried for the loss of their lives. He cried for the loss of his opportunity to know and love his daughter. And then he cried for the hurt he’d caused himself, but most of all, Regina. Hecried until he was empty, and the only thing left inside him was hope. Hope for a tomorrow he’d never dreamed he could see.
He pulled his handkerchief from his inner jacket pocket and nodded to them, but more so, to himself.
“I’m going to honor the two of you by loving her boldly and honestly, and by being the best father I can to our baby. I’m finally going to let the two of you rest in peace.”
A gentle breeze connected with his cheek as if a hand were cupping his face, acknowledging what he’d said and encouraging him to follow through.
Suddenly light with hope, he stood, bent into a bow to show his reverence, and then he turned toward the car. His wife and child were expecting him, and he’d be damned if he’d keep them waiting any longer.
She fought hard not to wake up. The moment she rose, she would have to face whether her husband chose his guilt or her and their baby and the life they were supposed to be building together.
Even with the blackout curtains drawn, she could tell the new day was upon her. She could also tell something else.
Her husband was not in the bed with her.
Refusing to hide, she pulled herself up and leaned her back against the massive headboard. Her eyes were still closed as she made a running list of the things she would have to do now.
Contact a divorce attorney.
She was married to a king. Could she even get a divorce? Charles and Di and Andrew and Fergie divorced. There had to be a way she could rectify this mistake. It was one thing for her to marry a man knowing he would never love her. It was something altogether different to know he couldn’t or wouldn’t love herbecause he’d rather hold on to crippling guilt than accept the love she wanted to give him.
Look for a place to live on Obsidian Island.
They might be splitting up, but she wasn’t leaving. No matter how her heart hurt, she would never take their child from him. She wanted Aléx to be an active, present parent.
Staying on Obsidian Island would be hard. She knew that. She would miss every second she wasn’t with that man. Aléx had somehow embedded himself into her bones, and freeing herself from his hold was not going to be easy. She’d have their baby. She’d also have her work and her lab. She’d stayed up much later than she intended trying to numb her mind with work. Her line, Obsidian Queen, was set to launch six months from her due date. Now she was transferring leadership to her assistant in preparation for her maternity leave. Aside from distracting her from her hurt and worry, hopefully the work she was putting in now would keep the launch on schedule. Apart from their child, her hair care line might be the only thing she had left to keep her going if things didn’t work out.
Relief bled through her as she thought of her work. She’d made certain the entire deal she’d made with Aléx gave complete, irrevocable ownership to her. She’d spent most of her working life in a lab. The wheeling and dealing part of business just wasn’t for her. But she’d picked up enough from watching her sister and their Devereaux cousins to know how to protect her assets and interests when it came to signing contracts.
Her forethought meant she could be independent here, something she’d come to treasure. She’d never regret working with her sister all these years. Having something of her own…it meant she was finally learning who she was. And deep down, Regina was strong. It would hurt, leaving this man she loved so desperately. Yet she had no regrets. She’d done all she could do. He’d made his choice, and now they would all have to live with it.
“Are you done making your list in your head? If you are, I’ve got your morning cup of orange tea and this godawful apricot jam you insist on putting on your toast.”
She kept her eyes closed but couldn’t stop the happy tugging at her mouth that demanded she let the biggest smile she’d ever shone cut loose.
“Don’t knock it ’till you’ve tried it. Your kid is on this fruit kick that’s got me in a chokehold.”
She heard him settle the tray on the nearby nightstand before he crawled into bed beside her, pulling her into his arms until she became the little spoon to his big spoon.
“It was my intention to be here when you awoke.”
He held her tighter, as if he were afraid she would slip through his fingers at the first opportunity.
“Then why weren’t you?”
“Because I had to take some time alone to say goodbye. I went to their graves and paid my respects.”
Her hands clasped around his, making her strength available to him if he needed it. She’d seen him at his most vulnerable last night, and her protective instincts, where he was concerned, made her want to fight the world on his behalf, even if that included him.
