“If you’re asking me if I’m too chickenshit to stand by you, you’re wrong. For as long as you’ll have me, regardless of how difficult and messy the situation, I want to be the man by your side.”
She stepped back, needing to put some distance between them. The light, spicy scent of his cologne coupled with the heat his nearness brought were enveloping her. She was overwhelmed, and being this close to him made it hard for her to think.
“You wouldn’t want to be with me if you knew the real me.” She was certain of that. A man like him who subscribed to the ideals of truth and justice could never tolerate someone with Aja’s particular flaws. “Jackson, I—”
He stepped closer to her and placed a finger of her lips. “Aja, if you’re gonna try to push me away, save your breath. You are everything I’ve ever wanted, and there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to keep you safe. There’s nothing I wouldn’t work like hell to see you through. I’m here because there’s no place in the world I’d rather be.”
She lost her battle with her tears; they spilled from her eyes and slid down her face like fat raindrops on the smooth glass of a window. He pulled her into his arms, cradling her head against his heart, making her need to purge herself of her fear and guilt even more profound.
She plastered herself against him, wrapping her arms around his waist and holding on for everything she was worth. In such a short time, he’d become her anchor, the thing that kept her from drifting off into the sea.
When her shoulders stopped shaking from the sobs that racked her body and her tears stopped flowing, he whispered in her ear, “I’m yours, baby girl. I’m not going anywhere.” And just like that, Aja’s soul opened, and her heart danced in her chest. Jackson may have been the one to make the offer, to say the words, but her heart was filled to bursting with the invisible link that tethered them.
She should’ve walked away. People like her—guilt-ridden and condemned in their own minds—didn’t get the refuge Jackson was offering her. Once you screwed up, life rarely let you get do-overs. But standing here in this big, beautiful man’s arms, Aja knew one thing. Coming to Restoration Ranch may have been the first step on her road to redemption, but Jackson Dean was the last mile. He was living proof she could not only restore herself but rebuild, make herself a new thing.
Doubt tried to crop up, to snuff the small glimmer of hope burning inside her. But Jackson squeezed her tighter, and Aja decided whether she deserved it or not, she would take this opportunity to reach for everything she wanted. And right now, that was Jackson Dean. As far as she was concerned, no matter what this phantom stalker had in mind, she would fight for her people but also herself and enjoy this repose for however long it lasted.
Chapter 39
Aja smacked the pillow in her hand to fluff it.
“You keep abusing my pillows like that, and I will call the law.”
Aja stopped midfluff and smiled at Seneca looking at her from the en-suite bathroom door. “I want to make sure you’re comfortable. A few days ago, you were passed out in a hospital bed because of me. The least I can do is fluff your pillows now that you’re back home.”
Seneca walked over to the bed, her gait still slow as her body took its time to recover from the drug she’d ingested. She sat on the edge of the mattress and patted the space next to her, showing Aja she wanted her to sit too. “You didn’t do this. This wasn’t your fault.”
“It was meant for me.”
Seneca shifted on the bed, trying to make herself more comfortable. “Yeah, it was meant for you, but it was my fast ass that swiped the drink from Jackson’s hand. I put myself in harm’s way. Stop blaming yourself.”
“You ended up in the hospital.”
Seneca shrugged, the pallor of sickness giving way to her usual bright smile. “Yeah, where people waited on me hand and foot and let me sleep all day. Some people would call that a vacation.”
An unexpected giggle threatened to bubble up in Aja’s chest. She shook her head, scolding herself for succumbing to Seneca’s antics. “This isn’t funny, Seneca. The amount of Rohypnol you had in your system could’ve been deadly if people hadn’t been around when you collapsed. How can you laugh about this?”
The smile dropped slightly from Seneca’s face as she settled her eyes on the floor. “The one thing prison taught me is that sometimes you have to laugh to keep from crying if you want to keep your sanity. Being locked away in a metal box for all those years wasn’t fun, Aja. But finding a reason to smile, to laugh even, kept me from doing something drastic like slitting my own wrists. Getting drugged, collapsing, and spending a few days in the hospital isn’t exactly how I would’ve planned to spend my time. But it could’ve been worse.”
She let her hand rest on top of Aja’s, its contact bringing the gentle warmth of comfort Aja’s raw soul craved. “Instead of me sitting here laughing at my own misfortune, I could be dead. Then who would be here to make you laugh? Brooklyn?” Seneca waved a dismissive hand through the air. “We both know that girl wouldn’t know a sense of humor if it bit her on the ass. So I gotta stick around a little longer to keep things light around here.”
Aja could feel the tears slipping from her eyes as she thought of losing Seneca. But just as quickly, the painful thought was replaced by genuine laughter. “You’re so wrong for that.”
“Tell me I’m lying.” Seneca waited with a raised brow, staring at Aja, waiting for an answer.
“I can’t,” Aja replied. “But Brooklyn’s strength is a more than admirable substitute.” Seneca bumped her shoulder and shared a broad smile. The sight of it lifted Aja’s spirits, but it wouldn’t erase the guilt layering itself all over her soul. “Seneca, I’m supposed to take care of you and Brooklyn.”
Seneca shook her head, placing a caring hand on Aja’s knee. “You’re supposed to provide us with fair employment. You’re supposed to pay us a fair wage for our labor. You’re supposed to make sure you report any illegal activity you are aware we’re involved in. You are not, however, responsible for us. We’re grown women, Aja. We have to be responsible for ourselves.”
Aja let Seneca’s words settle over her. She was more than aware that Seneca and Brooklyn were grown women, but she’d be lying if she said she didn’t feel a sense of obligation to them.
“I promised you a new future. Not imminent danger.”
Seneca shook her head slowly again. “No, you promised us the opportunity to build something for ourselves. I am so grateful for all your help. But it’s time you let Brooklyn and me take care of ourselves and you focus on taking care of that fine-ass man you should spend more time with. You’ve spent the last few days holed up with me in a hospital room and then signing on to be my nursemaid here at my cabin. When are you making time for him?”
At night when I’m too exhausted from work and caring for you, I collapse in bed. He makes love to me until I’m boneless and too tired to worry about all the hell breaking loose in my life.“He’s staying at the main house with me. I see him every night.”
“Good, now go find him. He needs your attention. I don’t.”
