“Die like Catherine did.”I finish for him.“I heard.Now tell me about her.”
“No.”
“Yes.”I meet his eyes.“If I’m going to die because of this bond, I at least deserve to know what happened to the last woman you loved.”
Pain flashes across his face, so intense I feel it echo through the connection.“I didn’t love her.Not the way I—” He stops himself, jaw clenching.“It doesn’t matter.”
“It matters to me.”
“Why?”
“Because I need to know if you blame yourself for something you couldn’t control, or if you’re actually dangerous.”I reach up, placing my hand over his where it rests on my shoulder.“Tell me what happened.”
He stares at me for a long moment, conflict warring in his expression.Then, slowly, he starts talking.
The story pours out in fragments, a schoolteacher in 1497 San Francisco.A woman who saw him for what he was and loved him anyway.Six months of stolen moments and careful feeding before the bond started taking its toll.Her body wasting away despite his attempts to feed less, to break the connection, to save her.
“She died in my arms,” he says, his voice barely more than a whisper.“And her last words were ‘it was worth it.’Like dying for me was some kind of privilege.”
The grief through the bond is crushing.Old and deep and never fully healed.And underneath it, something else—shame.Self-loathing.The absolute conviction that he’s a monster who destroys everything he touches.
“That’s why you have your rules,” I realize.“Never feed from me.Never touch more than necessary.Never fully claim me.”
“Rules I’ve already broken.”His smile is bitter.“Every single one of them.And now you’re tied to me, and I don’t know how to keep you safe from myself.”
I should be terrified and running for the door, never looking back.But instead, I step closer until we’re inches apart.
“Let me ask you something,” I say.“Did Catherine know the risks?”
“Yes, but—”
“Did you force the bond on her?”
“Of course not, I—”
“Did youtryto save her?”
His eyes close.“Every day.Every fucking day, I tried.But it wasn’t enough.I wasn’t strong enough to resist her, and she wasn’t strong enough to survive me.”
“Then it wasn’t your fault.”I place my hand on his chest, feeling the cold of him through his shirt.“She chose you.She knew what might happen and chose you anyway.Just like I did.”
His hands come up to frame my face, and his eyes search mine desperately.“Tessa, you don’t understand.The bond is cumulative.The more I feed, the stronger it gets.Eventually, it won’t matter how careful I am.I’ll take too much, and you’ll—”
“Then we don’t let it get that far.”I lean into his touch.“We figure out how to manage it.We set boundaries.We—”
“There are no boundaries!”His voice cracks.“That’s what you’re not getting.The bond doesn’tcareabout boundaries.It doesn’t care about rules or good intentions or how much I want to protect you.It justtakes.”
“Then we’ll find a way to break it.”
“You can’t break a blood bond.”His laugh is hollow.“That’s the whole point.Once it’s forged, it’s permanent.The only way to end it is death.”
The words hang between us, final and damning.
“So what?”I say finally.“You’re just going to push me away?Pretend this connection doesn’t exist?Spend however long we have left treating me like I’m made of glass?”
“Yes.”His voice is firm.“Because the alternative is watching you die, and I can’t—I won’t—”
“You don’t get to make that choice for me.”Anger flares hot in my chest.“I’m not Catherine.I’m not some fragile thing that needs you to protect me from yourself.I made a choice back there, Vex.Ichoseto give you my blood.I chose to forge this bond.And I’m choosing right now to stay.”
