“I don’t regret anything. Without her, I wouldn’t have my kids. They’re the reason I finally slammed the door on politics, you know. So I could spend more time with them. And when I got hurt and had to retire…”
“I read about that,” she murmurs, her arms winding around my neck tighter.
“She was a model who put her career first. You do the math. I was turning into the sort of man she never would’ve married. The kind of guy who knew his limit and who stops chasing fame and power once he’s had a taste. No surprise, she was done with me. Shit, with all of us.”
“That’s not fair. She had kids—she should always put them first.”
“You’d think,” I whisper, tucking her hair behind her ear. Unlike Daria, Margot’s beauty looks effortless, and it makes her more appealing.
“It must have been brutal.”
“It was a lot of change. Hard to stay focused on what matters sometimes for sure. And not everyone was on board.”
“Your dad?”
“Furious. I threw away the future he’d planned out down to the last detail, the war chest of money he’d raised and everything else. You already know how Daria felt. After hockey, I chose a start-up instead of jumping into the primary for the open seat in Congress. Our marriage went from checked out to total shit real fast, and I’m not sorry. I can’t be. We never should’ve gotten married in the first place.”
“But then you wouldn’t have the twins,” she reminds me.
For a second, I just stare at her.
Awestruck because shelistens.
“That’s why I don’t regret the disaster. How can I? Without Dan and Sophie, I don’t have a clue who or what I’d be.” Though there’s plenty I wish I’d done differently, yes.
I never should’ve wasted so many years entertaining what other people wanted, trying to jam their enormous square dreams through the smaller round hole of mine.
“Did you ever love her?” Margot hesitates, like she’s not sure she wants an answer.
“I thought I did once. Before I knew any better or knew what kind of person she was. But now, looking back… I don’t think I ever did. She certainly never loved me. If it’s love, you don’t fucking cheat. Not hard.”
“That’s so shitty.” Her eyes glisten, and she makes a little sigh of agreement.
“It was. But it’s not so bad now. I’m not limping around wounded or anything. I’m just glad to be out of there.”
“My ex cheated, too,” she says.
I instinctively pull her closer.
“Tell me his name and I’ll make sure he’s sorry.”
She laughs.
“No need—he’s not with me, so that’s payback enough. He actually thought I’d just forgive him because how was he supposed to limit himself to ‘only one person’? Jackwad. Like it was no different than morning coffee.” She laughs bitterly, then shrugs. “I thought I’d be heartbroken forever, but I’m doing pretty well these days.”
“You’re better off without him, duchess. No question.” I can’t control the jealous thorns in my voice.
“That’s what I realized. And I hope you did, too.”
“Definitely,” I say. “Daria was a drag on my life.”
“But you shouldn’t keep blaming yourself for her behavior,” she tells me now, leaning in to kiss my neck, soft lips fluttering against my skin. “Everyone makes mistakes, and you did the right thing. You put your kids first.”
As I hold her, I wonder if I’m doing anything right now.
Falling for this strange woman who drips false promises like honey, bringing her around my kids, knowing there’s no future.
If only she didn’t feel this good.
