“Well, since you’re early, do you want something to eat?”
I chew my lip, knowing I need to save every penny I have. As if reading my mind, she shakes her head.
“Meals are included here. You can eat what you want when you want. Del insists on it, actually. Nine times out of ten, we end up taking food home too.”
“Really?” She nods. “Okay, then I’ll have a banana muffin and a cup of decaf, if that’s okay. Is there anything you want me to do while I’m here?”
“You could make sure the sugar pourers are full and each table has condiments. I don’t think Del got around to it before she left last night.”
“No problem, I can do that.”
“Eat first. Trust me when I say, if you get a chance, take it because you never know when the next rush will happen.”
“Got it.”
She hands me a little plate with a muffin, then sets a mug of steaming coffee in front of me. “Creamer and sugar are just behind you.”
“Thanks.” I grab what I need to fix my coffee and sit on one of the stools at the counter. I take a bite of the muffin and eat itslowly. It’s not the best muffin I’ve ever had, but it helps keep the nausea at bay, and that’s enough to make me happy.
I’m just finishing up when Del walks out from the back. She looks at me and frowns. “I thought I told you ten?”
“No, you did. My neighbor decided to wake me up with death metal?—”
“Enough said.” She walks around the counter and pours herself a cup of coffee before taking the seat beside me.
“Feel free to park your car in the staff parking lot. It’s free parking, so you don’t have to worry about getting towed.”
“Oh, I don’t have a car. I actually can’t drive.”
She looks surprised but doesn’t say anything.
“There’s a bus stop outside my apartment complex, so it’s not a problem.”
She scrunches up her face. “Right now, it’s light out. But once winter rolls around and the nights start getting longer, that won’t be safe, Hazel.”
“It’s only temporary,” I tell her, which seems to be my go-to answer for everything lately. “Starting over’s a process, but I’m good. I promise. I won’t let you down.”
“I’m not worried about that, and I know all about starting over.” She pulls a napkin from one of the dispensers and whips out a pen from her pocket before writing her cell phone number on the napkin.
“Here. If anything comes up, just call me, and we’ll figure it out. I don’t want you taking stupid risks just because you’re running late or something, okay?”
I give her a genuine smile. She acts tough, but I’m starting to think it’s just a front to hide how soft she really is. As she looks at me, I recognize the loneliness in her eyes. She might have her life figured out, but you can still do everything right and end up alone.
It makes me feel a little sad for her and a little scared because I might end up the same way. Sure, I’ll have a baby to love and love me back, but I won’t be the kind of parent who expects having a kid to fix me. I might have a lot of love to give, but I have too many cracks in my heart to ever truly feel whole.
Chapter Fifteen
Midas
I’m actinglike a pathetic junkie jonesing for his next fix. I spend my days at Au and most nights outside Legs’s apartment. Only now, it’s not enough anymore.
I take a deep drag of my cigarette before tossing it to the ground and grinding it out with my boot. I blow out a plume of smoke, knowing Legs would have something to say if she saw me. Then again, maybe she wouldn’t. Maybe she’s past caring about me altogether.
I scrub my hands over my face as I look around. It’s pitch black. The two closest streetlights to where I’m parked are out, leaving me in total darkness. I take it as a sign that this is the best spot for hiding because I’m a fucked-up idiot who thinks about crazy shit like that.
“What the fuck am I doing here?” I grumble as I feel my cell phone vibrate in my pocket. Not wanting to give myself away, I turn my back on the apartment and answer when I see it’s Capone.
“What’s up?”
