He’s quiet when he gets home, and I hate it.
Mark’s the life of our family. It’s not like him to be so withdrawn.
A week after our doctor’s visit, we’re still no closer to any resolution about what to do next, and after dinner with Sophie in bed, I join him on the couch.
His eyes have been filled with guilt since he got home. I know how to read him after all this time, and there’s something he’s holding back from me.
The only thing I’m sure about is that he’s not cheating on me because he’s been so steadfast in his love that hasn’t wavered since the first night we spent together.
“What’s happening with you? You’re scaring me.”
He meets my gaze. “There’s something I need to tell you. You’re not going to like it.”
I swallow hard. The one thing I love about our relationship is our ability to communicate, but I’m not so sure right now.
“Tell me.”
“A few weeks ago, I ran into an old friend of mine. He made me an offer—six months building work in Dubai at really good money, and I said no because I didn’t want to be away from you and Sophie."
A lump forms in my throat. “Okay.”
“I called him back today and told him that if it was still on the table, I’d be interested.”
“Why?” I croak.
“Because I’m struggling with what’s happened, and I know you are too. I thought maybe we could get away for a while?—”
“When?”
“I’d leave in a week. There was more time to prepare but I said no originally, and now if I want the work, that’s the timetable.”
I close my eyes and grit my teeth. “You signed a contract.”
“Yes.” He grabs my hand and I open my eyes. “We need this, Cassie. Some time away from the mundane. Somewhere different.”
I shake my head. “But we can’t all go. Sophie has school and I have work.”
“Can’t you just take some time off?”
“With a week’s notice?” I pull my hand away. “I’m used to you being impulsive, but usually it’s things that benefit us. It sounds like the money is a good reason, but being away for six months? Now?”
He frowns. “I know. I just … I need to do something. I’m climbing the walls here feeling like I’m failing you.”
I sigh. “You haven’t failed me, Mark. It could have just as easily been me who had an issue. Even after having Sophie. The accident could have caused any kind of damage."
“But the doctor said?—"
“What if on top of that there’s something wrong with me that they just can’t see easily? What if it doesn’t matter what we do,Ican’t conceive?” I lean against him. “We’re in this together. And now you want to run away from it all.”
“Because it’s making you miserable. I thought we could just get away.”
I turn my head and look into his eyes. “I love you. But I can’t just up and go. You can though. I mean, you have to if you’ve signed a contract. And you have staff you can put in charge here while you’re gone.”
“I’m sorry.”
I shrug. “What’s done is done. I can’t stop it, can I?”
He grips my chin and pulls me closer. “I love you, Cassie. More than I ever thought possible. And when I’m back, we’ll be able to build that extension onto the house you always wanted. I’m sorry I’m such a fuck-up.”
