Doc looks up from the chart he’s scribbling in, annoyance flashing across his face. Interrupting him is…dangerous, but he sighs and sets the chart aside. “Alive. Everything was superficial, and he can be moved away from my area whenever the guards figure it out.”
“I’m waiting on Tennant’s instructions for that. It’s not my area anymore.”Thank fuck for that.
Doc straightens his coat and waves toward the room Allesandro is staying in. “You can go in, if you want. He’s certainly more docile than I’ve seen. Even my barbed comments didn’t get a rise from him.”
“You sound disappointed.” I smother a smile as Doc huffs, but doesn’t reply with more than a grunt. His bedside manner iscertainly different than Dr. Ranlen’s. I have to admit, I like his better. He may come across like an asshole, but he’s passionate about his job. I respect that.
Glancing at my former friend, Boss, and Master’s room, I draw in a deep breath and roll my shoulders back. I’m prepared to go into battle, if needed. Doc doesn’t say anything else as I give him a nod of thanks. I knock briskly, waiting for Il Padrone’s acknowledgement. His soft voice throws me, but I open the door and step through, thinking I’m prepared for anything.
One look at him and I realize I wasn’t. He’s always been so put together. I could blame it on him not wearing a suit, but it goes so much deeper. His hair is in disarray, there are dark circles under his eyes, and every inch of him seems to scream defeat.
I immediately soften my voice as I pull up a seat, asking, “How are you today?”
If he finds the question weird, he doesn’t mention it. He only briefly meets my eyes before dropping his gaze. Sidestepping the question, he replies, “I’m glad you stopped by.”
“Was there something you needed, Padrone?” It’s a reflex to ask, but I can’t help it. He’s still my former Master.
He flinches as if he’s been scalded. With a whimper, he shakes his head frantically. He croaks out, “Please don’t call me that.”
My eyebrows pull together as I cock my head in confusion. “What do you mean?”
He raises his head, and his dull blue eyes scream with so much pain that it almost takes my breath away. “I’m not Il Padrone. I never was.”
“That’s not true,” I argue back, my heart beating quickly as I try to figure out what the fuck is going on.
Pressing his lips into a thin line, he lets his head droop again, as if he can’t bear the weight pressing down on him. His voice isfirmer than it’s been since I came in, as he once again denies it. “No. I am not, and never have been. I never deserved that title. I certainly don’t anymore.”
We lapse into a tense silence, and my very soul howls at the devastation emanating from him. I meant to break him, not destroy him. Yet, I see nothing left of my friend. Hell, maybe it would have been better to kill him. “I?—”
When I don’t finish the sentence, he clears his throat before waving his hand weakly. “Will you take over what’s left of the organization?”
It’s a damn good thing I’m sitting down because what. The. Fuck? I run the words through my mind again, but they still don’t make any sense. I shift in the chair and try to understand. “Are you asking me because you think I won or something?”
“No. I just…don’t want it. It shouldn’t be mine. Hell, it shouldn’t have been my father’s either.”
“Well, we can agree about it not being your father’s, but you have always done a good job with it. Sure, you did some things that weren’t exactly right. Everyone’s fucked up though. I mean, look at what I did to Benjamin. And thank fuck you were there to put me in my place.”
Panic begins to choke me, as I never expected him to lay his whole life’s work at my feet. I may have once dreamed of ruling this territory—hell, ruling it by his side—but he was right to offer me a territory of my own, away from here.
“At least, you didn’t do it to the man you love, that you were supposed to protect and cherish. There’s no coming back from that.” A tear falls onto the blanket, but he makes no move to hide it.
Swallowing hard, I look away, unable to acknowledge what’s going on. Slumping in the chair, I offer the only acceptance I can—complete honesty. “No. But I’ve been in Lio’s shoes. And I still love him. He’s a sum of more than the wrongs, and hell,more than the rights. He’s shown me who I am and who I can be. You gave me the chance to find myself, and to embrace my individuality—he’s the one who caught me when I thought I’d fall. So no, I will not take over. I have my own place now in life.”
Allesandro gives a shuddering breath as he peers up at me, only partially raising his head. There’s a flicker of hope before it quickly dies. “I’m glad you found where you’re supposed to be. And that you had that chance.”
I hesitate, unsure what to say. He never had that chance, and we both know it. He’s the product of what his father made him. Hell, I never noticed he was so broken by that man and his friends, and I should have.Fuck. They broke him because they could, and what did I do? Destroyed what was left. I desperately need to fix this, but I’m not sure how. I wanted him to realize he was wrong, to fix it, not…this. Never, this.
“Allesandro—”
“Please,” he cuts me off. “Do you think…fuck, nevermind.”
“No, tell me,” I encourage, hoping to make a connection—anything at this point. He clenches his shaking hands into fists, mumbling something I can’t hear. “Please, speak up.”
Taking a deep breath, he faces me fully. “I don’t want to be called that. Do you think…back when we were still kids, when we were friends… Can you…?”
It takes me a moment to realize what he’s asking, and I struggle not to let tears of my own fall. “You are still my friend, Sandro. And I know you’ll find your way back.”
He gives a watery laugh, but doesn’t agree. Instead, he offers me his hand, and when I grasp it, he squeezes it weakly before leaning back in the bed and closing his eyes.
