“That’s not true, atall.” My signs are sharp. “We’ve always needed you. From the very beginning, you’ve been ours.”
“I’m not letting him—them—go.”
I watch Jude for a long moment, trying to gather my thoughts, trying not to give into the visceral reaction that tells meno. Antonio cannot have our little lamb. Not if he means to take him away from us.
Contrary to what some may think, considering I’ve allowed my lovers to have free rein with the Martellis, I am possessive of what’s mine. And Jude, despite how he doesn’t seem to fit with us, is mine. He has been since the day Leandro told me about him.
“You’re with Lio. You’ve seen past his exterior, past the monster Tennant likes so much. Allesandro…he fucked them up. Antonio…he’s so fucking beautiful, inside and out. You’d like him, he bends so easily. I want to love him, and I didn’t even know that was a thing I wanted. Hell, I didn’t even want arelationship before you, Ten, and Roman. But…I want to show Antonio what he deserves.”
Jude runs a hand through his hair, tugging at the curls, before he loosens his tie.
“I know what it’s like to be ignored, to have your needs shoved aside because they were an inconvenience to someone else. Allesandro likes mind games, and sure, those are fun, but he only took, never gave. I want to give Antonio everything.”
“That’ll take time, and work. Tennant and I are already in the middle of the battle with Lio, and to a lesser extent, Benjamin. You really want to take the three of them on? Because I understand it’s not just Antonio, but the twins, too.”
“Yes,” he voices. “I…love him. And I might not know Nario and Nicolo well, but I care for them, too. Maybe it’s selfish to want you all, but I don’t give two shits. I spent so long hiding who I was, and what I wanted, I’m not giving this up. I’ll make it work. I just…might need to spend more time with them for now, get them to trust me, to understand that I’m not Allesandro, and I mean what I say.”
He shakes his head, anger darkening his pale green eyes. “Antonio said some things last night, unconsciously…that made me want to ram a knife into Allesandro and see how he felt being gutted. I didn’t catch all of what he said, but…he’s so broken, so used to being left behind, he couldn’t hold his thoughts in.”
“Allesandro molded them into what he wanted,” I remind him.
Jude’s mouth turns down. “And I want to do the same. Maybe it’s fucked up of me to say so, but…it’ll be better for them all in the long run. And I do mean all of them. Allesandro fucked up. He tore his family to shreds. He calls himselfThe Master, but he doesn’t know what that word means. If he did, maybe none of this would be happening.”
“No…” I agree, a pang going through me at the thought of not having Emilio…
“We can do this,” Jude says. “We can give them what they need, while showing them a better way to live.”
“We’ll be just as manipulative as him,” I point out.
Jude shrugs. “A little, maybe. You can help Lio heal as you see fit. Show him how to have a healthy relationship with the type of play he needs and wants, and I’ll do the same for Antonio.”
“Okay,” I agree. Because how can I not?
The Martelli Boys have gone through so much already. It’s unfair of us to dangle everything they ever could have wanted over their heads, only to take it away so cruelly because they don’t do or react how we want.
So…if giving them what they need means inserting whatwewant into their lives, then we’ll do it. The difference between us and Allesandro is that we know how far we can go without breaking them…
Jude moves in close, and I draw him in further, forcing him to voice as there’s not nearly enough signing space between us. “Thank you, Hol.”
I kiss him, pouring the depth of my feelings into him, and hoping he understands the gift I’m giving him and his lovers. The Dom in Jude wants to care for Antonio, and I’m not in a position to deny him. Not if I want to keep him. Not if we want to keep Antonio from Allesandro.
“You’re mine,” I say. I move him back a little to sign my words. “You’re mine, and that means Antonio and the twins are under my protection now. Whatever you need, it’s yours, Agnellino.”
He grins. “If I said I needed you to fuck me?”
I start to grin, but then an alert sounds on my computer, as well as my smart watch and phone. “Fuck!” I gently push Jude further away. “Alarm,” I sign in explanation.
Sitting at my computer, I check which of the several alerts I have up is going off. I’m taken aback when I see it’s from the encryption program I’ve been running to decode the app that the mysterious “Organization Leader” who called Daniel used.
“What the hell?”
“What?” Jude asks.
A quick glance at him fiddling with his phone before putting it in his pocket tells me he put his hearing aids in—he had them out for our meeting with Roman as he needed the break. Add “Make sure Antonio and the twins learn ASL somehow” to the top of my to-do list. If they want to be with Jude, they need to learn, and help the rest of us establish what we’ve been trying to do for the past year now: Not let him inconvenience himself for anyone else’s comfort. It’s a habit we’re still working on when it’s just the four of us, and he knows we’re all fluent in his language. The least I can do is make sure his other lovers are as well.
“I’ve been trying to track down the call placed to Daniel. It was a long shot for a variety of reasons. Prominent was that they registered it to someone not connected to them. I also couldn’t rule out that they built their own communications app—after all, I did for us. However…” I trail off as I double, then triple check what I’m seeing before turning back to him. “It looks like I got a hit.”
“You know who it was?”
