The kid parrots her curse, and she groans, all flustered and adorable. I crack a smile. The little guy swears like me.
“That is not a word for you, Noah.” The smile returns to her face as she looks at him.
She’s softened by the boy, and motherhood suits her. I wonder at the asshole who let her and the boy slip through their fingers.
“It’s none of my business, but do you see the father?”
My chest aches. I want to be the man who’s there for her, not the ghost she’s come to scold.
She gives me a quizzical look. “Um, no.”
Something jogs my memory. “Hudson said the father wasn’t around.”
When she shakes her head, her hair falls around her face like a waterfall. “Did he now?”
“It’s the reason he got out.”
She frowns and pulls back. I prop myself up on my elbows so I can see her.
“What do you mean?” The boy toddles over to her.
He really is cute, with a mop of dark curly hair and wide chocolate eyes. He tugs at her leg, and she hoists him onto her hip.
“He left the SEALs to help you raise the baby.”
Her brow creases in confusion. “He left because he got injured.”
My brain is drug-addled, but I’m sure about this. He spoke to me about it at length. Some scumbag knocked his sister up, and she wouldn’t tell him who. He was torn between his family and the Teams.
“I remember. He left because his sister was having a baby on her own, and you don’t have any parents. He needed to be there for you.”
Her expression turns from confusion to anger. “He didn’t. I’ve raised Noah on my own. Hudson being around has been a massive help, but he didn’t leave because of me.”
But there’s a waver in her voice that tells me she isn’t sure.
“What kind of scum leaves you pregnant and doesn’t own their mistake?” I know as soon as I say it that I’ve made a mistake.
She clutches the child to her chest and clamps her hands over his ears. “Noah is not a mistake,” she hisses.
I hold a hand up, apologetic. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it to come out like that.”
The child wiggles in her arms and whines. “He’s the best thing that’s ever happened in my life, and I wouldn’t change a thing. And the father didn’t leave me pregnant because the father never knew.”
She’s breathing hard and holding the kid too tight, because he squirms in her arms and protests. I get the feeling there’s something here I should understand, but my brain can’t make the connection.
“The father didn’t know because we didn’t exchange phone numbers or names.”
Cogs in my brain are moving into place, but still I can’t grasp it. He’s the product of a one-night stand, which meant the Rose I knew must’ve been having more than one.
The boy starts to whine, and she pulls him back to her chest, lowering her voice. “Noah will be three in March. Do the math, Ryan.”
Noah swivels his head around to stare at me with eyes that remind me of my mother’s.
Finally, the cogs clank into place, and my breath stops in my chest. She kisses the top of his curly head, trying to calm him. But all I can do is stare.
“He’s...” I can’t say the words. My throat is dry, and my mouth opens and closes like a fish gasping for air.
She wraps her arms around the boy’s head, covering his ears again.
