My fingers dip into my aching flesh, and I can’t hold back the softest moan, encircling my clit till my breath comes in shallow pants. My taut muscles contract and throb to the point of pain as I slip two fingers inside, sliding in and out, giving myself what I desperately need. I find my own raw, untouched walls and delve into the blissful madness of wanting Shaw to be the one who stretches me. Splaying my knees open, I press my palm against my clit and continue working my fingers inside myself.
Cresting to an orgasm, I hear the wind rattle the window Aslaug broke, easily breaking through the loose lock. A cold, snowy gust kisses my sweaty nipples. The sudden chill takes me over the edge, and my legs shake while I come, squeezing my fingers with each clench and release.
Spent and laying on the bed, I decide that if I can’t find the bow, I will sacrifice myself before I marry Harald. I will die before I let a man take away my womanhood.
Latching on to that thought, I rise to close the window and resist the urge to leave the village through the loose slats in the wall again.I need to find a way before the end of Yule or I am going to die resisting this marriage.
I comb my hair, braiding it in sections and wind the plaits around my head to keep it off my face. The buzzing between my legs doesn’t stop when I pull my leggings up, barely touching myself. Adjusting my breasts in the heavy red and green dress over my warm layers makes it hard to breathe, and I half curse ever meeting such a man. We will probably run into each other during the day or at tonight’s Divination feast and I wonder if he woke up as needy as I did? Divination is always exciting. Who doesn’t want to learn about their doomed future?
“Rasha!” Jorvik’s voice bounces off the walls, and I stuff my knife in my dress near my rib cage before opening the door.
“Good morning,” I briskly greet him as he strides inside.
“What happened to your window?” he asks immediately. He hasn’t been here completely since the first night when we walked to the lighting of the Yule log together.
“It’s fine. A raven got in looking for food,” I answer, wondering if he will believe the deep claw marks are from a raven’s beak. Jorvik rarely hunts or deals with animals, so hopefully he will have forgotten that ravens are opportunistic birds who wait to be presented with food.
“It’s so hot in here. How much firewood do you go through?” Jorvik walks around the room, and I quickly slide Shaw’s shirt under the blankets as I make the bed.
“I am alone, so I get cold.” I shrink, using the same excuse I gave Bjorn that first night. He picks up the little, wooden carved statues that I placed on the mantle, given to me at various dinners by the little ones. Putting my fur cloak on, I tie the front up and wait for him at the door.
“Shall we go, or are you looking for something in particular?” I ask, standing in the doorway. I don’t think Shaw or Aslaug left anything, but I never know what type of mood Jorvik is in.
“You’ve slept in this room every night alone?” he asks, walking past me into the hallway. Catching up to him, we descend the stone staircase, and I nod, but that doesn’t satisfy him.
“I need you to show Harald you give a shit.”
“I told you my thoughts on Harald.”
“And you promised you’d be kinder, more malleable, but at dinner you’ve barely spoken to him. I heard from one of the girls that you were asking about the blacksmith.”
“The man who I tied with in the archery competition?”
“Don’t play dumb.” Jorvik’s anger spills over, and I straighten my shoulders as we arrive in the courtyard. “Today you will spend the whole day with Harald. And tonight too. He wants you, and all he needs is a little push.”
“I am not a breeding mare. What else can I do to secure our clan’s safety?” The courtyard is busier this morning as people collect their offerings and fill wagons with the extra supplies needed to set up the stronghold for the next week.
“Marry Harald. Accept his proposal. Give me a nephew. A son with our blood that I can use to unite us.”
I swallow bile and bite my tongue. Obviously, Jorvik has thought through everything, planning down to the next generations of my blood and using them to manipulate me.
“Harald will take our son and send him to the King or outright kill you when you are no longer necessary. Have you thought of your own safety?”
“No, because I am working on having something he needs.”
“Besides me?”
“Besides you.” Jorvik keeps me in the corner so I have no choice but to hear him out. “I heard a rumor that your new friend has a map to the reindeer, and it was stolen off his person. Is that true?”
“Why would I know that? I don’t need a map. I am sure I can find the reindeer herd if you ever allow me to stay out on the mountain like our parents taught us,” I argue, keeping my tone low. No one is supposed to know about the reindeer herd. The last time they were found the clans hunted them to near extinction. Our parents were killed because they would never have given up the knowledge they had about the reindeer’s migration patterns and because I was a reckless child.
“You need to find out from Shaw if he knows where they are.”
“Aren’t you worried if I talk to Shaw that Harald will take notice?”
“Maybe it is not such a bad thing that Harald knows he can be bested by another man? And that I, your brother and his advisor, will not be played. Now go sit for the daily offerings like the Maiden is supposed to. No matter who catches your eye, Harald will be your husband.” He turns me around by my shoulders and sends me on my way.
Stuffing my hands in the pockets of my cloak, I walk out the front gates to see Shaw leaning on the wall outside the forge. His chin perks up when he sees me, but I keep walking. Being pushed and pulled by the men in this awful village will end as soon as I figure out how to break through the ice covering the tomb.
