Dan crouches in front of Mathias, and the pair have a hushed conversation. I want to eavesdrop, but Eggo and Snatch have just arrived, and slowly more of the team fill out the space, and well, rugby players aren’t typically known for their volume restrictions.
“Mate, what happened to you on Saturday night? Did you score with that rich kid?” Eggo says, noisily dragging his chair over to Pi’s left side.
“No, we didn’t hook up, I just—”
“Mmhmm,” Eggo cuts me off, scratching his chin like a detective in a TV drama. “Fine, tell me about it later.” He turns to Pi, his tone and body language instantly softening. “How’re you holding up? You okay?”
Pi’s silent for a few seconds. “No. Not really, but I’ve decided not to let myself think about it too much until the end of the season.”
This is a barefaced lie. I’d spent two hours and fifty minutes on the phone to Pi last night while he travelled through four of the five stages of grief.
Denial:“No, Georgie’s made a mistake. She didn’t mean any of that.”
Anger:“She’s horrible, she’s selfish, I hate her.”
Bargaining:“I could change. I could be the guy she wants me to be.”
And depression:“Fuck her. Fuck everything. Fuck my life. Can’t I just stay here on my couch forever?”
A lot of time was spent here at the fourth stage. We’ve yet to reach the final stage—acceptance—but I’m sure it’ll come.
Before yesterday, I wouldn’t even have been able to explain what the five stages of grief were. In fact, I didn’t know they existed, but I’d had quite a lot of time to research the theory. Almost three hours, to be precise.
“I’m going to go back to Perth for the summer,” Pi says.
It’s the first I’m hearing of it, but I guess he’s started to make a dent in “acceptance.”
“Well, British summer, not Australian summer. I just need some time to process.” He turns to me with raised brows and a quiver to his bottom lip. It’s a question . . .“Is that okay?”
“What are you going to do with Trekkie?” I have no idea why those are the first words to fall from my lips.
“I’ve booked him into a kennel for five weeks.”
“No,” I say.
Pi laughs. “What do you mean, no? It’s a great kennel. There’s a big open space for the dogs to run around, and they get twice daily walks.”
“No fucking way is my baby Trekkie staying in a kennel for five weeks while his bastard owner ditches him for another continent. He’ll come stay with me.”
“Really? Are you sure?”
“Of course. What else will I do all summer with you gone?”
“He’s such a pain in the ass, though. You’ll have to walk him at least twice a day, and he chews everything. Hide your sliders, those are his favourite. And he stinks. His farts are lethal.”
“Anosmic, remember?”
“Mate.” Pi smiles dopily at me. “I just really love that little fucker. I owe you one.”
“Yes,” I agree, because admitting how nice it’ll be to have something love me unconditionally for five weeks would leave me feeling way too fucking vulnerable for a Monday morning.
“Dearly beloved,” Dan bellows from the front of the classroom like a vicar at a wedding. The Cents quiet down immediately. “I’ve gathered you here today because . . . I have an announcement to make.”
Dan glances over at Mathias and my stomach flips.
“But first, a massive congrats to Gadget and his wonderful new husband.”
There’s whooping and cheering. I clap because I’m not a total cunt.
