“Hi…” was repeated back to her on the lips of thousands of goblins, drawn out in a mirrored awe.
“Very great,” said the goblin at her side, and he tapped the scepter to end the glow with a reverberating thunk. Then he fell into a deep bow at her feet. “Majesty Amma, me Gribtoss Visor to King. But, if wish, can call as old king called.” At this, he peeked up sheepishly.
“What did your old king call you?”
“Shithead.” He swallowed. “Sometime Big Dumb Shithead.”
Amma covered her mouth to hold back a chuckle. “Please, no, what’s your actual name?”
The goblin’s lip trembled, still in a deep bow. “Mama call Skoob.”
“Skoob? Oh, that’s much better. Skoob will do.”
He popped back up, positively beaming, then turned to the others. “Sentinel gobbies!” He clapped at the twenty or so surrounding them at the cavern’s entrance, and the ones with the heaviest makeshift armor all stood at loudly-clanging attention. “Lots stuffs to do! New king need new banners, need new sleep space, need armor, weapons, cape, and all those need be big cause new king ise-norm-us.”
At this Amma winced, but it was fair, relatively.
“Also need food, lots too, and need redo old tin-er-y to new king rule.” As he doled out work, the remaining goblins dispersed one or two at a time.
No longer quite so surrounded, Amma edged over to Damien, the blood mage still much too terribly amused, and even Katz looked on the verge of cracking a smile. “I think the fun part is over now,” she whispered. “There are so many of them down there. Enough to stand up to more than a strong gust of wind.”
“You would abandon your subjects at a time like this?” Damien’s eyes had gone wide with mock horror. “Quite irresponsible. And is this not just what the oracle said would happen? You can’t possibly run away from this, your destiny.”
Amma would have dragged him right out of the cave herself if what he said hadn’t struck her so deeply. The oraclehadsaid she would become the head of a vast empire, but that…that had only been an example at best, and a joke at worst.
“Now, Majesty,” said Skoob, turning back to her, “take on tour of clan, show barracks, show dining hall, show far reach of cavern, and, uh,”—he lowered his voice and waggled the crinkly skin where his brows would have been—“show harem too.”
“Oh, gods,” Amma closed her eyes tight, pinching her nose.
At that, Damien broke once again into infuriating laughter. So, it had been a joke of the oracle’s after all.
“Dis concubine?”
When Amma opened her eyes again, Skoob was pointing at Katz.
“By Sestoth, no! Oh, no offense, Katz.” The imp did appear to be offended, but then that was how he always looked.
Skoob’s eyes roved up to Damien then. He pointed at the blood mage, and his lip curled in a sort of repulsed way. “Disconcubine?”
Finally, the all-too-pleased smirk Damien had been sporting fell away and he crossed his arms tightly over his chest, giving Skooba look. Too bad it was about five minutes too late.
Amma finally had a chance to giggle out a bit of relief. “No, no, that’s—actually, yes, he is.”
Damien was so stunned he was, for once, at a loss for words, mouth falling open and nothing coming out.
“No account for taste,” Skoob muttered then gave Damien’s leg a shove without moving him at all. “Go, join harem. Moghart take you.”
Another goblin had appeared at the top of the ramp. Unlike most of the others, this one was female, dressed in softer fabrics, and had an even slighter build. She reached up for Damien’s hand, but he snatched it away.
Amma clicked her tongue. “Now, Damien, what’s wrong?Yousaid they’re harmless.”
“Oh, Amma, be reasonable.” Indignation had settled into his glare pinging from the new goblin who was hopping to try and grab his hand again to Skoob who was pointlessly attempting to push him away.
Amma bent, hands on her knees. “Moghart, you’re going to be very kind to Damien, aren’t you? You’re not going to put him in prison or take away his powers with an enchanted collar or threaten to sell him, right?”
The female goblin shook her head very quickly, ears flopping.
“Good. But I do think he could use a bath. You know, maybe make him a little more presentable?”
