"I didn’t think earls opened their own doors," she said, glancing behind him as if waiting to see Soames appear. "At least, I don’t think my father ever has."
"I’m not sure I’m a very good earl," he said with a laugh. "Or at least not a very conventional one."
"I’m not sure why I’m here," she admitted softly.
"I’m really glad you are," Ezra said, stepping aside. "Please, will you come in? I want to show you the castle."
"I’ve seen the castle."
"Not all of it."
???
Constance did not understand Ezra’s plan, but she did know that she was pleased to see him – and that she had chosen to turn up in spite of it all. That had to mean something.
He was quiet as they walked through the hallway and up the stairs, heading in the same direction they had gone the last time she was there.
"You’re not going to abandon me again, are you?" she couldn’t help but ask.
"No – and I owe you an explanation."
"You don’t have to—" Constance began, feeling she ought to offer the nervous man an escape.
"I do. You told me why you’ve been running away from me, and I need to tell you why I have been doing the same."
She couldn’t help but smile at that. "We have both been running away, haven’t we?"
Ezra nodded. "But I don’t want to run any more."
Constance felt as though her heart flipped in her chest at those words. She didn’t want to run either. That was why she washere, wasn’t it? Well, that and the fact that Charity would never have let her get away with not coming.
They reached the door that had proved such a problem before, and Constance found herself holding her breath, wondering whether he would be able to go through. And then he took her hand, and all thoughts fell away. He took a deep breath and opened the door.
There was nothing terrifying behind it – as she had suspected. They seemed to be the countess’s chambers: a bedchamber, and a circular turret room with a cosy armchair off to one side. There was a hole in the roof, with a bucket beneath it, and yet other than that the room looked fairly undisturbed.
"These are the countess’s chambers," Ezra confirmed, and without letting go of her hand he moved forward, down another corridor and into another room with a damaged roof – the purpose of which was clear, but he said it anyway.
"And this is the nursery."
Constance didn’t know what to say. It felt as though anything she said now wouldn’t help, when he had been so strong as to come into these rooms that he had clearly avoided, and to show them to her – to stop running away.
He turned to her in the silence, and she saw his eyes were glassy.
"The late countess – Laura. I’m sure you know how she died."
Constance nodded, even though she didn’t really want to admit to listening to gossip.
"I have not been able to come into these rooms since she died. I have held myself responsible for her death, and the baby’s, for all these years. I hid myself away in grief at first – and then in guilt."
"But you’ve nothing to feel guilty for," Constance said, squeezing his hand where they were still joined.
"That’s something my mother agrees with you on – and I believe I’m beginning to see that what happened could not have been helped, that I could not be blamed for it.
"You told me of your fears that there would be someone prettier, that my interest would be pulled away, and I said nothing. That was wrong of me, and you must forgive me. Because, Constance – you are beautiful, and you are the only woman I have ever felt this way about. I will not have my interest pulled away by another, because there is no one else. You are the only woman I have ever considered marrying since Laura passed – and you are the only woman that I ever will."
Constance was speechless. She had not expected this level of honesty, nor to hear that he wanted to marry her. It was all her dreams come true, even if she hated that he had been in so much pain for so long.
"I have run away from the world for so long, and you made me want to re-enter it. I know you have been scared – scared of being rejected, scared of being passed over – but I can promise you this: you are the only woman for me."
