“I’ve got us covered,” I say, thanking my past self for getting an IUD.
“Are you sure?”
I take my hand and cover his mouth. “Would you just shut up and fuck me already?”
He pulls his mouth free of my hand to kiss me while he lines his hips up with mine. Then, in one swift motion he presses himself inside of me. I gasp at the sensation of him, loving how he feels like he was made specifically for me. While we had sex before we broke up, it was nothing like this. It was awkward and clumsy and in the moment the best thing to ever happen to me butthis? This is unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. He moves his hips in such a way that carries me higher and higher. As he kisses me, his hands explore my body like he’s discovering it for the first time. He holds me close as we work to become one, making me feel needed and whole all at the same time. The same way he’s always made me feel which is exactly why I fell in love with him in the first place.
“You’re still as perfect as I remember you,” he shudders as I feel him getting closer to the edge. I match his rhythm, lifting and lowering my hips in unison with his. “I love you, Noelle. Love the way you do that.”
I’m not sure if it was a slip or what, but I try my best to not focus too much on how those three words hit me square in the heart as he said them. With his hands around my back, he takes the reins and fucks me harder. The pressure of him rocking into me starts to build, causing me to cry out in the darkness. It doesn’t take us long to be falling over the edge and getting lost in the pure bliss of one another. I bring my lips to his shoulder, biting down into the soft fleshy area, and giggle when he shivers.
“You’reshaking.” I laugh.
He slides out of me, causing me to shiver too.
“So are you.”
For a moment, I do nothing but lie on top of him and wish that, even if for a day, we could stay like this. That we could stay in this delusion that we reallyaremarried, reallyaremeant to be, reallyarein love. But as always, the logical side of my brain pipes up and reminds me that this is temporary, fake, and nothing more than a one time thing. That he will be going back to Boston once the holidays are over and that I will be left behind in Evergreen once more.
Just like before.
“Here, let me get you something to clean up,” he says, kissing me on the cheek and guiding me off of him. Standing from the bed, he walks towards the bathroom and comes back a moment later with a washcloth. He flips on the lamp standing in the corner, washing the room in a warm glow. Seeing his face for the first time, I can’t help but laugh.
“What are you laughing at?” He smirks, setting the washcloth down beside me and leaning in for a kiss. I give him what he wants before pushing him away with one hand.
“Nothing. This. Us.”
“I don’t think that was nothing and I loved this and us,” he replies, pressing his smile to my lips again, stealing another kiss. My hand comes to his cheek and holds him in place, trying to commit the feeling of his lips on mine to memory.
“So did I,” I say, biting back what I really want to say.
“Here, let me help you.” He pulls me closer to the edge of the bed and carefully separates my legs. Then, he uses the damp cloth to wipe away the remnants of what we did. “If you want to shower or anything you can. Bathroom’s all yours.”
“I’ll shower in the morning. I think I’d rather head to bed.”
Standing from the bed to leave, he catches me by the wrist.
“You’re not seriously going back to the couch? Not after what just happened?” He looks at me like he can’t believe the choice I’m about to make.
“I thought maybe you’d want the bed to yourself,” I reply with a shrug.
He points a finger to it and gives me a stern look. “Get in bed, wife.”
I screw my face up at him and try to look tough. “You know, you really shouldn’t call me that. Not with this only being a thing for a few more weeks.”
When I turn to crawl into bed he playfully smacks me on the butt.
“You’re the one who broke the rules, sugar. I can do whatever I want, whenever I want. And that includes calling you my wife at every chance I get.”
Moving to turn off the lamp, he comes to bed once darkness has filled the room once more. I feel the bed give way to him as he crawls in next to me, reaching over and pulling me close. With an arm draped around me, he presses his lips to my forehead.
“Goodnight, Noelle. Thanks for coming and getting me when you needed me. Please feel free to do so as frequently as you need.”
I pinch him softly causing him to chuckle before kissing me on the forehead again.
“Goodnight, husband,” I joke even though I love calling him that. “Thanks for being there when I needed you.”
“I’ll always be here for you, Noelle. Always.” His voice is fading as he falls asleep once more. Tucked into his chest, I wonder how true his words might actually be this time.
