He stalks me towards the trees, and because I’m too focused on ensuring he doesn’t charge and eat me, the tree approaches too soon. My back hits it and before an escape plan forms, he’s on me, a hand slamming the trunk above my head, his body creating a barrier that’d take magick to get free.
Crazed, silver eyes meet mine, confirming one thing. He’s spoken to his father, and I might need another pack member, like his beta, to save me from the wolf that’s becoming dangerous and deranged.
“What thefuckdid you do?” The bark cries as it cracks, and a quick glance up reveals claws sprouting. At least now I know the murder weapon.
“Idid nothing!”
“My father.” His free hand grips his hair, and with it, his energy wanes. His shoulders slump and the manic in his expression fades. It’s in a broken whisper he says, “He’s dying and there’s nothing I can do to stop it.”
“I’m sorry.”
They’re words that seem appropriate, but it’s hard to guess. Witches have a different relationship with death. We accept it, knowing their souls are either with Hecate or reincarnated into other living beings on Earth. The last person I saw my mother mourn for was Harlow and her parents, mainly because of the horrible way they were taken from us and how it was much sooner than it should be.
“Youknew.” As quick as his whisper and grief seeped out, it’s gone now, the wolf returning. Claws strike the tree above my head, crashing like thunder and energized by pure emotion—rage and heartbreak. “You fuckingknewand you did it anyway. You knew he’ll die before the week is up, before the other coven could fix what they caused, yet you still did it. The Darkness. Youtookit, even though you’re scared of what it’ll do.” Nails shred the bark as he brings his hand down to my cheek, cupping my face and tipping it up to meet his eyes. Claws that could tear me in half stroke my face, a gentle caress of death. “Why’d you do it, when it makes no difference? Why would you do that even if itcouldmake a difference?” His hand grows heavy, claws biting into my skin, punishing. Any second, he’ll pierce the skin and yetI don’t flinch. Don’t move away, sensing Ryder needs this. “Why would you put him, a shifter, above yourself? Fuckingwhy, Carina?”
When he stops, his breaths a near-pant, and I believe he won’t start up again, I answer with a simple statement, an almost comical number of words compared to his speech. “He doesn’t deserve to die in pain.”
Ryder’s brows dip low and with a decompressing breath, his other hand joins the first, cupping my face, his claws sliding into my hair. It tingles my scalp, and though I should probably fear him, that isn’t the feeling running through me. His hold is intimate. Maybe more so than when I slept in his arms because this is fuelled by emotions and driven by longing.
“You’re supposed to be bad. Evil.” Nails scrape over my skull as delicate as his tone. “I’m supposed to hate you.Despiseyou. I was supposed to have you chained inside my cabin for the week and want nothing to do with you. I was supposed to be fuckinghappyto see you go!”
My swallow catches in my throats at all hissupposed tos.
“You weren’t supposed to beyou. The world is playing a fucking joke on me.” His gaze traces my face, memorizing me. “Evil beings don’t take on a Dark kind of magick for another’s wellbeing. Evil is selfish and hateful. Evil doesn’t make friends with a pack. Evil shouldn’t be good.You’renot evil… Why are you not evil?” His tone is guttural, his eyes so impossibly dark my own reflection flickers back at me. Defeat has him breathing hard, his voice barely audible, and those claws retract with every exhale. “Why are you so fucking confusing?”
“I don’t know what you want me to say. I’m sorry?”
“Sorry for being fuckin’ amazing? Don’t be,kamahki.” His body sways towards me, pressing me against the tree. “You shouldn’t have. Not at the risk of your own soul.”
“I wanted to.”
“That’s the worst part. You wanted to, and that says everything. I understand fate now.”
“What’s that mean?”
“Doesn’t matter.” He shakes his head roughly, hair flying in front of his eyes. “How do you feel?”
“Different. It was only a small amount, so hopefully only minor effects. In a way, stronger, like I could take on your whole pack. On the other hand, I still feel like me. Nothing’s changed.”
His breath blows softly over my face, and he drops his forehead to mine. His eyes flutter shut but I keep mine open, staring at the shifter who, for better or for worse, I now consider a friend. “I hate you for doing this to yourself. How can I protect you if you keep running off half cocked, putting yourself in danger?”
“You don’t need to protect me.”
A growl vibrates from his chest into mine, linking within my heart. “Thing is, I do. Everything demands keeping you safe, but you handed yourself to Darkness on a silver fuckin’ platter. I hate you for that.”
I bring my hands up to cup over his still holding my face, and my touch forces his eyes open. All it’d take is a slight tilt of my head to taste his lips on mine. “I’ll be alright. If I believed it’d be unsafe, I wouldn’t have done it.” A lie. “I didn’t want your dad to die in so much pain.”
He shakes his head without lifting his forehead. “This doesn’t change my mind,kamahki.”
After a long second, he retracts his fingers from my hair, then backs away. He stares into the forest, sighs with all the weight of the world, and softly demands, “Go home, Carina. Twilight Grove has no need for us; there’s no cure required anymore, but that won’t stop them from coming. Go home, tell your mother what happened. Your coven will be able to protect you behind barriers and other magickal things I barely understand.”
The ground staggers beneath my feet, rocking me forward, and I practically trip reaching for him, my hand finding the middle of his back. He shudders beneath my palm. “They’ll kill you if I’m not here.”
“We’ll disappear to the caves. They won’t know where to find us.”
“I still need the answers they’ll have. With or without your father’s life on the line, the plan must go through.”
Cords within his shoulders tighten, but he doesn’t turn around. “If you want to place yourself in danger, do so with your people beside you and not me. If you’re asking me to hand you to them, I refuse. You want to go? Leave. Because if you stay, I’m chaining you inside my cave, burying you in my nest, and they’ll never touch you.”
