“I’m aware of that, Sergeant,” Nic replied. “Cam’s also a friend. I know this is a difficult time for all of you. You’re doing better than most under the circumstances.”
“Who’s this?” came an even thicker Southie voice behind them.
Nic turned, spying the man who could only be Cam’s father standing in the doorway, two trays of coffees in hand.
Bobby relieved him of the coffees, passing them around, while Cam introduced Nic to his father, who greeted him warmly, expressing his gratitude for getting Keith’s leave extended. “You’re friends with Cam in San Francisco?” Nic nodded, and Ken slapped his back. “Be a good wingman and help my son find a wife who can get him to sleep.”
Beside him, Cam jerked, and Nic flailed for a response, at a rare loss for words.
A wife.
Not a wife or husband. And back in the hotel room, Quinn had asked if there was a girl in there. Not a girl or guy.
Was Cam not?—
Before Nic could finish his thought, a doctor appeared in the doorway.
“How’s Mom?” Quinn asked.
“Why don’t we all have a seat?” the doctor said.
“That don’t sound too good, Doc,” Ken said as the family scattered around the room, claiming chairs and sofas. If Nic had his way, he’d sit on the arm of the chair Cam had fallen into, but if his suspicion was right, that would be the last thing Cam wanted. So he took up a spot on the wall near him. Apart from the family but close enough Cam would know he was there for him and without causing him more distress.
“She’s holding her own,” the doctor said.
“With this many of us,” Quinn said, “she’s had a lot of practice.”
Laughter broke the tension, but then the mood nose-dived again with the doctor’s next words. “That’s good. She’s gonna need all her strength as we go on. We have to clean out some arteries, but I need to remind you of the possible complications, including an increased risk of embolism and stroke.”
Cam sucked in a breath, and Nic took a step forward, the instinct to go to him automatic. Until Cam stiffened, his rigid posture as clear a stay back sign as any. The comfort wasn’t welcome. Not here at least.
Because Cam wasn’t out as bisexual to his family.
The rest of the doctor’s words faded as Nic fell back against the wall and turned that revelation over in his head, a sandstorm brewing in his stomach and mouth and itching under his skin. Christ, the last thing Nic wanted to hide at this point in life was his sexuality. There’d been no going back after he’d made public that fact at eighteen. It had driven his every step forward. It was who he was, Garrett had helped him realize that. Serving during Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, he’d had to be careful, to take his extracurricular activities off base, but Nic had never pretended to be what he wasn’t. Embracing his sexuality was as much a promise to himself as a tribute to that first love and an atonement for what had been lost because of it. To be free and to love who he wanted.
If he and Cam kept building something, he wouldn’t want to hide that either. While Nic had been reticent last spring to make their relationship public—to protect Cam from Vaughn, to avoid awkwardness with their friends, to avoid issues at work—those were all temporary hurdles that could be cleared. And they had nothing to do with him being gay or Cam being bisexual. Cam was too good a man for Nic not to want to live and love him openly. This, however, was a much different, much higher hurdle.
It wasn’t a hurdle he could boost Cam over either. Coming out to his family was a decision Nic had made for himself. Granted, his hand had been forced, but he’d said the words, he’d made the final call. He wouldn’t—couldn’t—make that call for Cam, especially not in a situation that was already fraught with tension. And especially when he didn’t know enough about the Byrne family dynamics to know whether Cam’s coming out would be accepted. Sure, they’d accepted Jamie, but he wasn’t their son or brother. Nic recalled his interview with Becca yesterday, how she’d described her family turning against her. Like Nic’s father had turned on him. He didn’t think that would be the case with Cam’s family, but he didn’t know. Only Cam did and he’d chosen not to say anything about the two of them being more than colleagues and friends.
Which was what Nic would have to be. And only that. Far short of what he really wanted with Cam.
Fourteen
As the doctor continued to go over surgical forms, Nic excused himself to make a call. He needed to make sure the ball he’d started rolling yesterday with Justice on Shannon Murphy’s case was on track. He also needed a break from the mounting tension between the Byrne brothers and from the realizations he’d had about Cam and his feelings toward him.
He didn’t have long to dwell, his call expedited to the Deputy Attorney General. “Price,” he answered. “Tell me you’re calling with an answer about San Diego.”
“No, sir. I need to reserve that decision for the end of the week.” Given this latest development and the strain Nic sensed Cam was under being away from his family, San Diego was still in play. “Unless your timeline’s been moved up.”
The Deputy AG chuckled. “Price, you know as well as I do that my timeline is always moved up. But for this I can wait.”
“Thank you, sir.”
“Now, what was it you needed?”
He gave the Deputy AG the thirty-thousand-foot view of the situation, emphasizing his experience handling delicate cases, Cam’s experience as a K&R expert, and the potential connection Shannon’s disappearance had to multiple cold cases. Federal prosecutors didn’t usually go digging into those. Bad for the clearance rate. But Nic was willing to take the risk if it brought Shannon home and Cam’s family peace.
“They’re already overworked in the Boston office, and if the Bureau SAC there backs your and Byrne’s involvement, that’ll go a long way. I doubt they’re going to object but let me touch base with them and get back to you.”
