“Am I even more right now?”Cam asked between nips of Nic’s neck.
“Now you’re just pushing it.”Nic rotated his head, chasing after a kiss that Cam happily granted.They lazed in each other’s arms until the water went lukewarm, forcing them to rinse and get out.
Dried off, towel slung low around his hips, Nic unsurprisingly followed his nose to the coffee.Cam nudged him out from in front of the pot and fixed both their mugs.He handed one to Nic, who hummed contentedly, eyes fluttering closed as he took a big gulp.
Perfectly relaxed.
Finally, the time was right.
“You want to talk about it now?”Cam asked.
Nic rested back against the half bar that separated the kitchen from the dining area, staring down into his coffee.“I don’t know what to feel.”
“You feel how you feel.”
“You know what the dominant one is?Relief.”He took another long swallow before setting the cup aside, still avoiding eye contact.“What kind of son does that make me?”
“What kind of father was he?”
Head hung, Nic covered his face with his hands, and Cam set aside his own mug.Crossing the kitchen, he wrapped his hands around Nic’s wrists and gently tugged them down.“Talk to me, Dominic.”
“How?”Nic’s voice was ravaged, as were his eyes when he met Cam’s.“You almost lost your mother two months ago, and if you had, relief would have been the furthest thing from your mind.”
Cam stepped closer, holding their hands clasped between them.“If you lost me, or Aidan, or Eddie, would you feel relief?”
Gutted was the look, “God, no,” the words.
“Right, because we’re your family.Curtis wasn’t.”
Nic sagged as if it was the explanation, the permission he needed, and Cam let go of his hands to pull him into a tight embrace.Nic didn’t cry; Curtis wasn’t worth the tears.And Cam didn’t speak; Curtis wasn’t worth the words either.They just held each other, letting the tumult of other emotions run their course.
Nic was the one to pull away first, resting back against the counter and reclaiming his mug.“How am I gonna get through this mess he left behind?”
Cam grabbed his mug from the opposite counter and came back to stand beside Nic.“You do what you need to do.I’ll handle the rest.”
“Cam—”
He hip-checked him.“Let your family,let me, be here for you.You don’t have to go through this alone.”
Nic swooped in for a kiss.“I love you.”
“Because I’m awesome,” Cam said with a big smile.Mission accomplished.“We’ll get through this.It’ll all be over soon and then we can keep building our something without the threat of a nor’easter.”
“Earthquakes, Boston.This is California.”
He shook his head, then took a giant gulp of coffee.“Don’t remind me.The earth shouldn’t move without warning.”
“Welcome to my world.”
Three
“Boston!”Nic stood by the front door, briefcase hanging off one shoulder.“We gotta go if we’re gonna swing by Mary’s place and still get to the Federal Building by nine.”
Cam had been right.Nic felt better this morning despite the reality of his father’s death sinking in.While Vaughn was still his number one priority, the gangster wasn’t taking up all his headspace.He could think calmly about the rest of the to-do list, starting with telling Mary, in person, what had happened.
“I need to oil down this fucking skillet,” Cam hollered from the kitchen.“And the damn cat is trying to trip me up.”
“Try calling him Joe.”
