“That my brother isn’t into the games. That he shows up. That he’s all in.” She nodded toward the wall of Le Creuset bags. “Need more proof?”
I rolled my eyes, but I couldn’t stop the smile pulling at my mouth.
“He’s still doing too much.”
“And you love it.”
“I didn’t say that.”
“You didn’t have to. Your face said it.” She leaned forward. “To jumping. To being scared and doing it anyway. To my brother, finally finding somebody who can handle his extra ass.”
“Oh, y’all should be twins.”
“Please.” She clinked her glass against mine. “Welcome to the family, sis.”
We stayed another hour, talking about everything from hair, nails, and the latest fashion. Her restaurant and my station. Roller derby and cooking lessons. Her parents and my dad. By the time we left, I was two bottles in, armed with Le Creuset bags that Langston helped me load into my car, and Omni’s number saved in my phone.
“Text me when you talk to him,” she said, hugging me goodbye.
“You're so nosy. You and my best friend are going to get along great.”
“I prefer ‘invested in your happiness.’” She winked. “I really enjoyed hanging with you, Halo. Even if you and my brother don’t hit it off, I’d like to be friends.”
“I’d like that too. I’ll call you.”
We hugged and parted ways. I drove home with a car full of expensive cookware and a smile so new on my face it damn near hurt.
In two days, I’d have to decide. Either I jumped, or I sent this fine, paid man on his way.
???
Later that night
I couldn’t sleep. I lay in bed, staring at the ceiling, Brixxi curled against my side, the new collar DaVinci bought her sitting on my nightstand. The Le Creuset boxes were stacked in my kitchen, screaming, ‘I'm serious about you.’ I couldn’t turn the volume down, couldn’t get over how his voice had made my day.
And then there were Omni's words that kept circling back: “Don't let fear make your decisions. You run into fire for a living. You know the scariest shit is usually the thing most worth doing.”
She was right. I knew she was right. But that didn’t change my confusion about what to do next.
Jump.
“Ughh,” I groaned, tossing the pillow between my legs in frustration. Deciding not to fight anymore, I reached for my phone and scrolled through the photos from today. First, it was Omni and I tapping glasses. She’d insisted we take a picture, and I was glad we did. I swiped and came to the bags from Le Creuset, inside my trunk. Brixxi in her new collar. I’d documented it all. It was a reminder that DaVinci was consistent. He showed up even when I told him not to. And that meant something to me. It was something I couldn’t deny I loved, no matter how hard I tried.
My thumb hovered over my dad's contact. I’d called him not too long ago. And got no answer. I was okay with him not answering, because it would have been the same as always, short and possibly distant. And maybe that's what scared me most about DaVinci. Not that he’d hurt me on purpose, but that life would happen—an injury, a loss, some unbearable pain—and he’d do what Daddy did. Check out. Leave me standing there loving someone who couldn’t love me back anymore.
But then I thought about today's phone call. The way he said, “I want you. All of you. The good, the scared.”
The scared.
He already knew I was running, and he wasn’t trying to corner me. He was giving me space while making it clear he wasn't going anywhere.
I thought about Omni saying he’d shut down after his wife died. And then I thought about how he’d described me to her—like I’d woken something up in him he thought was gone for good.
What if I was doing the same thing to myself that Daddy did? Letting fear of loss steal my chance at a beautiful future with a beautiful man who clearly wanted me to become his sunrise.
I picked up my phone and opened my texts with Tessa.
Me:You up?
