“Do you often come down to the beach, Mr. Hodge?”
“Almost daily, at least for some part of my morning.”
“How curious that I have never seen you. I also walk the beach daily.”
Mr. Hodge seemed astonished. “Not see me on my own beach? It is more surprising that I should have never seen you, Miss Bingley, if you venture this far daily.”
“Sometimes I only go a little ways, and sometimes I travel in the direction of the bay, or I remain up on the cliffs. But what do you mean, ‘your beach’? I thought this beach belonged to Lord Connally.”
“Yes, of course it does. I only meant, since this is the beach I have come to since my childhood, that I like to think of it as mine.”
“Of course,” Caroline echoed.
“Well, since we are both here, why do we not walk together? I shall walk with you as far as Fairclough. The first tide has already come this morning, so we ought to be safe.”
“Yes.” Caroline turned and began to walk alongside him.
“Does your sister approve of your walking alone at this hour of the day?”
“What my sister does not know will not hurt her,” Caroline said with a hint of defiance. “Besides, today, I am not alone. I am with you.” She smiled at him.
He returned her look with a smile of his own. “You are different from what I expected, Miss Bingley.”
“Oh? How so? What expectation could you have formed of me, Mr. Hodge?”
“To be honest, when I first met you, I was certain you were only after my friend’s money and status. Too many women would jump at the chance to be the next Lady Connally without a second thought. But I see that you have not made a fool of yourself to snatch him, even after a rival lady appeared on the scene.”
Caroline grew uncomfortable. “Is that what you thought of me?”
“At first, yes. It pains me to admit it. But you are not like other young ladies. Most gentle-women would never walk on the beach unaccompanied, nor run through a field, nor lay down beneath an orchard with a man they were not engaged to.”
The impropriety of her actions struck her with guilt and turned her cheeks red with shame. Had she not looked down on Elizabeth Bennet for engaging in behavior that was even the slightest bit unladylike, and here she was, behaving like an ungoverned child? Yet beneath her scorn of Miss Bennet was a hidden admiration of her disregard for what others thought of her. Somehow, Caroline had unconsciously begun to imitate her.
Mr. Hodge noticed her discomfort. “I do not say any of this to shame you, Miss Bingley. On the contrary, I admire your spirit, your willfulness, your desire to defy your sister and whatever aspirations she might have for you.”
“And what if my sister’s aspirations for me are also my own? What if I do desire to marry Lord Connally, for all his wealth and the title it would bring me?” She raised her chin defiantly.
“If such is your desire, then so be it, if he should offer for you!”
Caroline turned her head forward and picked up her pace.
Mr. Hodge caught her arm and slowed her to a stop. “I mean no offense, Miss Bingley. Truly. I am trying to pay you a compliment, but here I am, making a mull of things. I have never had a way with words. Or with women. Please accept my apology.”
Caroline softened. “Very well then, I forgive you.”
They resumed walking.
Caroline began to reminisce aloud. “From the time I was young, the notions of what a young lady ought or ought not to do were heavily impressed upon me. My mother had great ambitions for her husband and her children. As my father’s business succeeded and his fortune grew, so did her expectations for what our futures might become. Expectations, I might add, which were passed on to my sister and, in part, to myself. As a child, I was defiant. I would sneak out of the house at every opportunity to play in the gardens and the woods. I climbed trees, swam in the creek, and picked wild flowers and berries.”
“You must have been a very improper miss in your mother’s eyes!”
Seeing her cast a sideways glance, Mr. Hodge retracted. “Apologies, I promise I will not continue to tease you.”
Caroline smiled, however. “I suppose my recent inclinations hearken back to those times. We went to the seaside in Blackpool every summer, and my love of playing in the water and the sand irritated my mother to no end!” Caroline sighed. “But mother soon put an end to it. Summers by the sea were traded for a house in town for the Season. My father became the mayor of our village, and my mother hoped to further his career in politics with a seat as MP for our borough. Failing such, she pushed him to look for a suitable estate to purchase. Sadly, that never occurred during my father’s lifetime either. As for me and my sister, we were each sent to the Ladies Seminary in London upon turning twelve. No more running about the grounds and the woods. No more climbing trees. Only lessons on deportment, the arts, and the modern languages. All the accomplishments a lady is expected to have.”
“Miss Bingley, I think that carefree child still resides within you. If I may be so bold, I think you ought to be free to choose what to pursue with your time, without regard for what others may think of you. It does not do to live your life according to others’ expectations.”
“Society might disagree with you, sir. Is this how you lived your life in Ireland?”
